


Take This Dance With Me

by BeeCharmerIdgie



Category: Call the Midwife
Genre: F/F, Softball
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24351490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeeCharmerIdgie/pseuds/BeeCharmerIdgie
Summary: Valerie Dyer is still missing something in her life when she feels like she should have it all. She has made a decent life for herself. She is now getting a chance to live out her dream of playing professional softball. She's on track to take over her grandmother's successful bar. Why isn't that enough?Lucille Anderson is ready to move to Cincinnati to escape the pressure of her family. She wants to find herself and she believes she will find her by accepting the athletic trainer position for a new professional softball team. She wonders if her life will ever be her own.Will they both find their answers?
Relationships: Lucille Anderson & Valerie Dyer, Lucille Anderson/Valerie Dyer
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am borrowing these characters for the story I want to tell.
> 
> This story takes place in the U.S.  
> It also takes place in 2020 without a pandemic.  
> There will be small changes to Valerie and Lucille's family backgrounds

They’ve only been practicing as a team for a little over four weeks. Despite this, they are already working together like a well oiled machine. Valerie pauses at this thought. A well oiled machine with a single squeak, and if that squeak had a name, it would be Jenny. Valerie smirks to herself. Jenny has yet to get over Valerie taking over the centerfield position. She should have never assumed it would be given to her just because she’s Jenny Lee, the daughter of the owner of the Cincinnati River Roses, David Lee. Valerie worked hard for her position on the team and she will continue to work hard to keep it, despite the glares she receives from right field, Jenny’s new home. 

Valerie jogs to the dugout to join her team at the sound of Coach Winifred (or Winnie), the defensive coach, announcing the end of practice. She still can’t believe her luck. For the first time in history, Cincinnati has its own professional softball team. The organization is taking a risk by creating this team and there is a lot of pressure to succeed, but Valerie just feels lucky to make the team and have a starting position. The politics behind the scenes can wait for later. Right now, she’s just going to bask in the moment and make the most of this opportunity she’s been given. 

After high school, Valerie attended the University of Cincinnati on a softball scholarship. Between grueling practices, games, and her school work, she worked at her grandmother’s dive bar downtown for extra money. Her grandmother, Elsie, raised Valerie as far as anyone is concerned. They never have had much, but they’ve always had the bar, softball, and each other. Valerie smiles. Finally, it is the bar, softball, and each other once more. Elsie was more excited than Valerie at the news of a professional softball team in their own city, and beyond ecstatic when she learned her own granddaughter would be playing for that very team. She would’ve loved to play herself, but she was a young wife and mother, and that took some of her childhood and all of her young adult life away from her. Times were different back then. This makes her all the more happy for Valerie. However, Elsie can’t take all the credit. Valerie pulled herself up by her bootstraps, if you will, all by herself, despite her circumstances. 

After graduating college with a nursing degree, Valerie enlisted in the Army. She felt this was the best course of action for her. Even with her softball scholarship, she had student loans she had to pay back. On top of this, she needed to move out of her grandmother’s home but this would also cost money. Elsie spent her whole life raising babies and taking care of other people, including her abusive husband, and Valerie wanted her to have time to herself; where she could focus on her bar that she loved as well as herself. The army was the best way for Valerie to be able to pay off her loans with the benefits the military affords, live outside of her grandmother’s space, and give them both time to grow into themselves. She has always been physically fit and enlisting felt like a natural part of life for her. 

Now, out of college, out of the army, and back in Cincinnati, Valerie Dyer proudly still works at her grandmother’s bar, where their relationship is closer than ever now that they’ve both grown into themselves independently, and plays professional softball for the Cincinnati River Roses. She’s on track to take over Elsie’s bar when her stubborn grandmother decides it's time to hang up her hat. She finally feels like she has her life together and she’s only 25. 

The team breaks their huddle after Coach Crane and Coach Julienne rip the team apart for their shortcomings and praise them for their strengths, all somehow in the same breath. 

Valerie looks over to Trixie, the energetic shortstop, as they switch their cleats for their slide on shoes. “I sometimes think Coach Crane hates us as much as she hates men.”

Trixie scoffs at this, “Phyllis couldn’t hate anyone more than she hates men,” Valerie looks around for said coach at the use of her first name, paranoid the grouchy coach will decide practice is indeed not over yet and her and Trixie should in fact run many more laps around the field if she were to hear such an informality, ”but I think we are a close second.” 

“I think I might’ve seen her crack a smile when we were practicing our bunts, though. I think it’s all an act.” Cynthia whispers. Cynthia is always soft spoken, Valerie thinks, so it was more of a whisper of her normal whisper. It still blows Valerie’s mind that Cynthia is not only one of the most aggressive second base players she has ever seen, but just the most aggressive player in general. Her persona on the field is the opposite of herself off the field. 

“It was probably a trick of the light. If it weren’t for Coach Winnie, we would never see a smile from our coaching staff.” Trixie states, once again too loudly. Valerie hurries to gather her gear so they can find somewhere else to talk about their coaches, somewhere Trixie can’t be overheard. 

“Do you chicks want to hit Elsie’s?” Valerie asks, as per tradition after Saturday evening practices. The tradition started after the very first Saturday practice and everyone learned of Valerie’s connection to a bar. Everyone responds in kind, besides of course, Jenny. Valerie thinks about asking her personally and putting her on the spot to come, but decides she doesn’t have the energy. She’s restrained from making any comments to Jenny about her attitude thus far. She doesn’t want to be the one to cause a stir on the team. And if Jenny doesn’t want to bond with the team, that’ll catch up with her come regular season and that will be her problem to deal with.

The team’s excited chatter grows louder around Valerie as everyone makes arrangements of who is driving who there and then home. Cynthia, Hilda, and Frances all volunteer to be the designated drivers and make sure the whole team gets home safely when the night is said and done. They are usually the same three that always volunteer. 

Valerie and Trixie leave the dugout together while everyone is still making driving arrangements. They both stay at Elsie’s after a night of drinking. She lives above the bar and they sleep in Valerie’s old bedroom. 

Trixie has become Valerie’s closest friend in the short time they have known each other. They first met at their tryout for the team since both of their last names fall in the beginning of the alphabet. They clicked instantly when their snark and humor matched up, albeit, Valerie’s is quieter and more subtle than Trixie’s bluntness. They have helped each other transition into this new endeavor and have been inseparable since. Trixie is her forever passing partner, as they fondly refer to each other. 

“I thought you were going to call Queen Jenny out on skipping team bonding once again.” Trixie snarks, ducking in the passenger seat of Valerie’s vehicle. It is a two door, 1999 tan Jeep Wrangler. It was the first thing she bought when she left the army. It may not be in the best shape but she takes great pride in it. 

“I thought about it, but I am not really fond of having her glare at me at the bar anyways, so I held my tongue.” Valerie snarks back as she starts up her Jeep and heads for the bar. She sniffs and realizes she can smell her equipment from her back seat. She is really going to have to do something about that, she notes to herself. Trixie must smell it at the same time because she makes a face and cracks her window. “Sorry.” Valerie mumbles. 

“You must have the patience of a saint. I am not even the one she is glaring at and I can hardly stand it.”

“I know how to choose my battles. I do not want Daddy Lee after me more than I am sure he already is for taking her spot.” Valerie is confident her coaches and the team manager, Violet Buckle, would and have protected her from any backlash from Jenny’s dad, but she does not want to push it.

“I understand that, but just know if you ever go in on Jenny, I am right behind you.” Trixie says. Valerie smiles. She is probably the most loyal friend she has ever had, even though they have only known each other a few months. “Not that you’d ever need me, with that sharp wit and those army arms.” Trixie dramatically fans herself, “If you were a man, I would have proposed to you already.”

Valerie giggles at that. “We are a match made in Heaven.”

“Or Hell.” They are still laughing as they burst into the bar. It has barely passed seven so there are only a few customers scattered about. They wave over to Elsie where she is topping off someone’s drink while they head upstairs to change and freshen up for the night. Their teammates will be arriving within the hour. 

Once downstairs, Valerie throws on an apron and joins Elsie behind the counter. Her teammates start to trickle in and she serves them their drinks. Elsie always makes the drinks half price, but everyone pays full price anyways. Everyone loves and respects Elsie. They know this bar is her livelihood. Not only that, but they love and respect Valerie so much that it extends to her grandmother and their bar. She has taken on the leadership role on the team and she feels herself swell with pride as she watches her teammates interact and laugh and enjoy each other’s company. She has somehow made it to exactly where she is supposed to be. She only feels a slight twinge of sadness when she sees the women, like Chummy and Barbara, interact with their husbands and boyfriends. Or Trixie in the corner charming several men. She has never longed for a man, but Valerie guesses she is longing for something. She is afraid she always will be.

****

“Dr. Turner will be in touch with further information.” The voice on the line says. Lucille Anderson hangs up her phone with her ingrained politeness. She can hardly believe it. She just got off the phone with Violet Buckle, the head manager for the new professional softball team in Cincinnati. Lucille has been in contact with her for the job of the team’s athletic trainer. She just completed her internship with the Ohio State University’s football team as their athletic trainer and just finished all her finals for her senior year. While she enjoyed her time with the football team and learned a lot, she was looking to move on. She loved her family but they were overbearing. They already did not approve of her medical path veering off into working on the sidelines with athletes instead of in a hospital as a doctor or a nurse, like they had. She worried if she stayed in her home city, she would let her family scare her out of sticking with her career of choice and bending to their wishes. She needed to at least get a few hours away, even if that would cause a new strain between her and her parents. Cincinnati was her chance. And Violet Buckle just offered the job to her. 

She bit her lip to contain her smile. This would open so many doors for her. While she traveled with the football team, she was still a student and was limited as to what she could do on those trips. This is still a job, but she will have more freedom to explore the places they get to travel to when said job is done. 

She looks down at her phone and pulls up her boyfriend’s number. He answers on the third ring, “Hello, Lucy.” Lucille flinches. She has told him she doesn’t like to be called that. 

“Hi, Cyril. I have good news.” She knows it won’t be good news to him. But for once, she is letting this be about her. “I just got offered a job in Cincinnati. They are starting up a professional softball team and they want me to be their athletic trainer.” 

He is silent for a beat, “Cincinnati? Softball? I didn’t know you were applying to jobs outside of Columbus.” 

“Well, I feel as if I’ve already hit my peak in Columbus, working for a champion football team. I think I am ready for new scenery and a new challenge.” She explained. It wasn’t the main reason for her wanting out of the city, but she knew he wouldn’t understand. Cyril was a good man, the best man. He was tall, handsome, smart, and athletic. He was a starter for the basketball team. He was charming and in the same social class as her. And that is why they were pushed together. Their parents run in the same circle and while at first, it was fun to date a man her family approved of and adored, she realized that was the only reason she was dating him to begin with. Since she had that epiphany, things haven’t been the same. He is her best friend. She loves him. She just doesn’t feel the spark she should when she is with him. She isn’t in love with him and their relationship very much feels like an arranged marriage. However, Cyril seems to be content with the arrangement. She is going to eventually have to work up the nerve to be the bad guy. But their relationship is the only thing about her that seems to still make her parents happy. They will be engaged soon at this rate. 

“Well, I can’t say I am surprised you already have a job lined up. You are the best at what you do.” Lucille feels herself smile sadly at this. Kind man. “But softball? I feel as if you’re selling yourself short. You could go bigger than that. I mean, you worked for the Ohio State football team.” But he was still a man, Lucille thinks as she feels herself bristle.

“The Women’s College World Series softball tournament is one of the most watched sporting events on tv. Softball is the future. I want to be there for it. And I can be with a brand new team. A professional team, at that. Just because it is a job with women does not mean it is less than.” Lucille chides.

“No, No. I know. I guess I just haven’t been paying attention.” Cyril replies, properly chastised. “Cincinnati is only a couple hours away. I am not worried. I will help my father with his business and our church and you will make a name for yourself there. We will come together, always.” 

Lucille can tell by his voice he is smiling. He reassures her without her asking. He will make a lovely woman so happy one day, it just isn’t her. She isn’t brave enough to say this yet, too afraid to lose him and even more afraid to lose her family’s respect further. 

“Yeah,” is all she can bring herself to say back. They hang up shortly after. She tries to prepare herself to call her parents and break the news to them. She hopes one day she doesn’t have to feel trapped in her own life. 

She is hoping Cincinnati holds the answers to questions she hasn’t even asked yet.

****


	2. Chapter 2

Lucille pushes the last empty box to the side and looks around the room. She can’t believe how fast things have moved. In just a week and some she has moved to Cincinnati and she starts her new job tomorrow. She was lucky to find an open apartment at such short notice. Dr. Turner, her new boss, admitted they were behind on the hiring process for the team and apologized for the rush. The team has already been practicing for over a month. Lucille hopes no one has gotten injured in that time, what without a trainer there. 

Lucille feels butterflies at the thought of tomorrow and meeting the women she will be looking after. It’s important she establishes a good working relationship with the whole team. During her internship, the football team had over sixty players. She eventually developed a rapport with the majority of the starters, but it took all three years. The softball team, however, has less than 20 players. It will be a lot more personable. Plus, they are women. She won’t have to worry about the harassment she faced occasionally with the men that had her second guessing every move she made while stretching a player or examining their complaint. 

Tomorrow, she will first go to the doctor’s office to meet Dr. Patrick Turner. He’s supposed to give her a short introduction to her job and the duties she will have to fulfill. Afterwards, the women are having their first practice of the day so she will drive over to the stadium to meet them and help whomever needs it. Her shift is split in two from there, since the team practices twice a day. She will have to go back in the evening when they have their strength and conditioning practice. Her schedule will look like this until the season starts in June, Dr. Turner had explained over the phone. 

She’d already timed the drive from her apartment to the stadium and from her apartment to Dr. Turner’s office earlier in the day. Lucille looks over to where she has her outfit laid out. She has yet to get official team clothing wear, so she is just wearing the standard khaki pants and black Nike polo. She has everything ready for tomorrow, she just needs to get her nerves under control. Her stomach swoops again. 

****

Lucille wakes up at 6am the next morning. She feels like she only slept a couple hours. Her nerves kept her awake. The only good thing is the nerves are making her wide awake now when she needs to be. 

She takes her time getting ready. She wants to look as professional as one can in simple khakis and a polo but not like she is trying too hard to just be going to a ball field. 

She chokes down her small breakfast, her butterflies making it hard to eat. She doesn’t get lunch until about noon, when the women’s first practice is over. 

By 7:30am, Lucille is walking down to her parking garage. She gets into her car and takes a few deep breaths. She says a small prayer to calm her nerves for the day. This is where she is supposed to be and wants to be, she reminds herself. She starts her car and takes off towards the doctor’s office. 

The traffic is heavier than it was when she timed her trip the afternoon before, but she planned for that. Everyone is trying to make it to work at the same time. 

She rolls into the parking lot with ten minutes to spare. The office is in what looks like a historic building but it has been well managed. There are two doctor offices in the building. Dr. Turner’s, as well as a Dr. Peters. Dr. Turner is the orthopedics doctor and Dr. Peters is an obstetrician. Babies and athletes in one building. What a pair. 

She sits for five minutes before walking in. She has her own medical supplies bag, but she thinks the doctor will be giving her an official one for the team so she leaves it in her car. 

Lucille walks in and takes a right to the ortho wing. She’s greeted kindly by an older woman with curly hair and glasses low on her nose behind a desk. The woman points her to Dr. Turner’s open door and says he is expecting her. 

She knocks lightly on the frame of the door and Dr. Turner looks up with a ready smile. “Good morning! You must be Ms. Anderson. Take a seat, please.” He gestures to the chair in front of his desk after warmly shaking her hand.

“Good morning. It’s nice to finally put a face to your voice.” Lucille takes a seat and tries not to squirm. She’s excited to gather all the information she can about this job. 

“Likewise. I am sorry again for rushing you down here.” 

Lucille brushes off the unneeded apology, “I am glad to be getting started so soon. I would rather do this than wait around.” 

“I have to say, I was pleased to hear from Violet that you accepted this job. I believe I am a fan of yours. You helped a championship team for three years. I have been a diehard Ohio State football fan since I can remember.” He points to a framed photo of what looks like a younger Dr. Turner posing with the Ohio State football field in the background. 

“I can say the same, Dr. Turner. Your practice works closely with the Cincinnati Reds. I have followed them since I learned what baseball is. I’m excited to go to my first game this summer.” Lucille relaxes back in her seat at this easy conversation.

“Ah, the Reds’ ballpark is one of a kind. The atmosphere is unlike any other. Let me know when you plan to go and I can snag you some excellent seats for the special occasion.” 

“You are too kind, Dr. Turner.”

“It is no problem. I’m sure you’ll be seeing some of the Reds’ players coming in and out of this very building.” He smiles and clears his throat, looking down at the papers in his hands. He switches to business mode. “Now, I’ll brief you on everything you need to know so you can make your way to the stadium. They start practice in just thirty minutes but luckily the field is only down the block.” He adjusts the papers again and looks up. “If you have any questions, interrupt me at any time.” Lucille nods. “Now, like I said over the phone, you’ll be working from 8am to noon on the field and 7pm to 9pm in the weight room on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays you’ll be at the weight room in the morning and the field in the evening. These are likely to switch up depending on the weather. I’m sure you’ll be added to some group message where you will be updated as the schedules change. Right now the women are having two-a-days but when the season starts they will only practice once a day.” He hands over the team schedule. One side has the practice schedule and the other side has the game schedule. “Any questions yet?”

“Will I be putting in hours in here at the office?” This is where she is employed out of, but knows probably won’t work here much. She pulls out a pen from the breast pocket on her polo to start jotting down a few notes.

“About every two weeks we have a meeting with all the trainers I have sent out to different teams. The meeting just consists of each trainer updating me on any injured players or difficulties they are having. They are very relaxed meetings.” Lucille nods her understanding. “You will have your own office and medical room in the stadium, but if you ever have a more serious injury you are working with, you can bring them here and use one of our rooms. You’ll also accompany any player that needs to be looked at by me. Your time spent here will be very sporadic. Mostly, you’ll work from the location of wherever the team is.” 

Lucille looks up from the notes she’s writing down on the back of the schedule. “Very flexible, understood.” 

Dr. Turner goes on to explain she will be in charge of stretching any tight muscles or injuries the players are complaining about before and after practices or games. She will have to tape up anything the players need taped. Anytime someone is injured on the field, it is her duty to be there immediately to assess the situation and make decisions. Anything she can diagnose, she does herself. Anything too serious, she is to contact Dr. Turner. She also has to rehabilitate any injured player so they can get back to playing. 

“I know this is a lot for one person. The team’s budget is not very big yet as it is in its first year so we could only hire one trainer. There are only thirteen players though, so let’s just hope they don’t all get injured at the same time. I’m confident you can handle this with your training. This is why we wanted you for this job.” 

“I’m grateful for this opportunity, Dr. Turner. I’m sure I’ll have no problems.” 

****

Valerie pulls her bag further up her shoulder as she walks into the stadium. After today, the rest of the week the team will be dealing with the press while practicing. The organization is trying to gather attention and fans for their new softball team. They need all the good press they can get. Mrs. Buckle had already warned Valerie that she will be one of the main speakers for the team. She isn’t sure how to feel about that. While she’s always been in newspapers and highlights during her high school and college softball careers, this is different. There is more pressure. She has to be perceived just right to bring in an audience. It’s so much harder for women. Valerie sighs. She can’t be too nice or the women will think she’s trying too hard and fake. She can’t be too mean and distant or the men will label her a bitch and unapproachable. She told Mrs. Buckle she didn’t much care if men labeled her like that, but all that got her was a lengthy chiding about the importance of appearances if she wants the team to get past its first year. 

Valerie opens the door to the locker room to see Barbara, the left fielder, and Trixie are already here and giggling like school girls far too early in the morning. “Morning ladies.” Valerie tilts her head to look at them when she makes it to her locker. They look suspicious and Barbara has a blush blooming under the surface. Trixie, however, is ever the actress. 

“Did you enjoy the Sunday off?” Trixie asks. Sundays are their only days off. That is, until they start having Monday games. 

“I did. I went to the sportswear store to buy some newer clothes for all the interviews and pictures this week. Mrs. Buckle didn’t give me much choice.” Valerie pauses, “Now that I think about it, if I would’ve pushed her a bit harder, I probably could’ve got her to buy the clothes for me.” 

“I can’t blame her for not wanting you on the news in your cut off t-shirts and softball pants with holes in the knees and thighs.” Trixie shudders like she is talking about Valerie committing a heinous crime and not just her clothing choices. “You look much better in this fresh get up.” Trixie appraises her new outfit. 

“You look softball chic, Val.” Barbara comments. 

Valerie looks down at her new dark gray softball pants and red and white baseball tee. “Thanks, I think. Maybe you girls can come over tonight after practice and help me choose my next few outfits.” Trixie lights up at the idea just as more teammates start to come in to get ready for the day. 

Valerie turns to open her locker and puts her things away when she collides with something solid. She knows who it is before she even looks up.

“Ope, sorry, love, I didn’t see you there.” Chummy Noakes pats the top of Valerie’s head. She is a gentle giant at over six feet tall. She was the best first basemen in the U.S. in college. She is nationally ranked. Yet, somehow she is also the clumsiest woman. When she runs it is as if she is only falling in a forward motion. Thankfully, first base is a rather stationary position and she hits the ball to the fence every time so she can make it to first base easily where the coaches can substitute her for a pinch runner, for everyone’s safety. Chummy is the only one on the team who is married with a child. She is fondly referred to as the team mom. She takes everyone under her wing. 

The locker room grows louder with everyone’s arrival and just before 8:30am, everyone filters out to the field to start stretching. 

When they walk out to the field, they see tubs lined up along the sideline. That can only mean one thing. Uniforms and attire with their team logo on it. Valerie grins. This is what makes professional softball stand out from all the other softball she’s played. There are some major perks. All of the coaches are here as well as Mrs. Buckle. They will all probably be lectured similar to how Valerie already has been on how to handle the media. 

Valerie notices a new face talking to Coach Fred Buckle, Mrs. Buckle’s husband and the first base coach. He is gesturing enthusiastically and the woman is listening closely with a soft smile that shows more in her eyes than on her mouth. Judging by her clothes, Valerie decides this must be the team’s athletic trainer. She’s pleased they hired a woman.

Besides Coach Buckle and Jenny Lee’s father, the team is run completely by women. Valerie admires this fact and believes it’s a good sign of the direction the team and organization is headed in. 

Valerie doesn’t realize she’s still staring until the woman looks over to her when Coach Buckle points to her. Valerie offers her a half smile and a quick nod before she looks away with a light blush. 

“Oh! This was always my favorite day! Getting all the gear for the season is so exciting. It means we are close to game days.” Frances claps her hands with a little jump, her cheeks pink from excitement or the early morning chill. Catchers are usually the most intimidating players on the team, but Frances is very much like a puppy.

“It is rather exciting. I wonder what team emblem they decided on.” Hilda, the third basemen, says. 

“Hopefully whatever it is, is nice enough to make up for the fact that we are called “River Roses”.” Valerie says under her breath. Patsy, the starting pitcher, hears the comment and snorts. 

“I’m sure it’s a very pretty, feminine rose with no thorns because that would just be too intimidating and off putting.” Patsy mumbles to Valerie. They both grin. 

“It better be fabulous or I’m not wearing it.” Trixie says just as Mrs. Buckle and the rest of the staff gather around the team and the tubs full of clothes. 

“I believe you will wear them no matter what, Ms Franklin.” Mrs. Buckle garners the attention of the rest of the team. “Good morning, ladies. As you all know, the media is coming this week, starting tomorrow, so we better get you all in your gear and look official!” There are cheers scattered around the huddle. Mrs. Buckle hands her clipboard over to Coach Julienne. “Coach Julienne will call your name, position, and jersey number off the roster and you will come to each tub where you grab your assigned clothing. This way we can kill two birds with one stone and our new addition can start to learn your names as you go through the line.” She gestures for the woman to step forward and Valerie’s eyes find her immediately. “This is our athletic trainer, Lucille Anderson. She is in charge of everyone’s health and you all must listen to her advice and follow it, no matter if you think you know your injury better than her. Be honest with her and please, please do not try to hide your injuries or pain. We need every single one of you healthy. We don’t have a big bench to cover people’s positions if someone were to get hurt. Coach Julienne, you can start calling names and then after we will talk about your media presence.” This time, the groans could be heard scattered around mixed with Trixie’s excited gasp. 

One by one, their names are called and they stop at every station where a coach hands them their gear at each tub. At the last tub is Lucille, handing out the optional visors. Each player introduces themself to her as they pass through. 

“Valerie Dyer, Centerfield, number 22.” Coach Julienne calls out. 

Valerie grabs the home and away jersey, the softball pants, socks, and several tracksuit outfits before she comes to Lucille’s station. 

“Hi. I’m Valerie. I play centerfield.” Valerie points to said centerfield as if Lucille wouldn’t know where that is and she immediately wants to slap herself. She jerkily sticks her hand out for Lucille to shake and thinks she ought to get a better hold of herself before she goes in front of the media. 

Lucille smiles kindly and takes Valerie's offered hand. “I’m Lucille, the athletic trainer.” She mocks Valerie’s blunder and points to her medical bag laying a few feet away. She grins to let Valerie know she’s joking. 

Valerie lets out a puff of a laugh and drops Lucille’s hand and subtly clenches it. “Welcome to the team.” Valerie replies. Lucille hands Valerie a visor.

“Thank you. Coach Buckle over there was telling me you are the captain.” She points down the line to the coach. “And a very good one.” 

Valerie lifts her hand to rub at the back of her neck and glances away, bashful. “Ah, well, I think they thought it best to put the army vet in charge. They think I’ll be the most intimidating.” 

“The only time you’re intimidating is when someone takes any form of potato off your plate.” Trixie butts in and elbows Valerie’s side. “Now move along. You’re holding up the line and I want to check out these clothes before Professor Buckle starts her lecture.” She shoves Valerie some more, “Hi, I’m Trixie.”

Valerie blushes at getting called out for holding the line up to talk to Lucille. She silently takes her exit to the bleachers where everyone is looking at their gear and waiting for Mrs. Buckle to brief them. She can hear Trixie gushing over Lucille’s curls behind her. They are beautiful curls. 

****

After the whole team goes through her line, Lucille gets pulled away by Coach Winnie. She met the coaching staff briefly when she first made it to the stadium, before the players came out of the locker room. They make up quite the staff, she can tell already.

“I get the pleasure of showing you around the stadium! But mainly, this is our chance to escape Mrs. Buckle droning on and on about the media. She already talked to us coaches. I would rather not have to listen to it again.” Coach Winnie giggles. 

She leads Lucille under the bleachers where there are public restrooms and concession stands. It is a rather nice stadium, Lucille thinks. She expected the equivalent to a high school softball field since they are women and they usually don’t get a fair shake in sports. 

They go through a tunnel and Coach Winnie points to the door where the locker rooms are. The door beside it is Lucille’s office that also functions as the medical examining room. 

“I know it is rather small, but this used to be the equipment room.”

“I have a desk and an examining bed, that is all I need.” Lucille smiles at the coach. She takes her laptop out of her bag and sets it on the desk but she keeps her medical bag on her shoulder. 

Coach Winnie shows her around the rest of the stadium. She shows Lucille where the lounge is for the coaches and staff, the cleanest bathrooms to use, and where she can sneak snacks from the concession stand. 

They eventually make it back to the field where it looks like the women have started their practice. Lucille makes a note that Coach Winnie is a talker and she needs to try to avoid disappearing during work hours with her. 

Lucille notices a beat too late that there is a huddle on the first base line with someone on the ground. She jogs quickly over and shoulders her way through the huddle. She sees who she remembers to be Chummy, the tallest woman she has ever seen, continuing to apologize to a slight woman that is sitting on the ground cradling her shoulder.

“What happened?” Everyone turns to Lucille at the question. This is when Lucille notices Valerie. She is bent down beside the small woman on the ground, rubbing at the woman’s shoulder as well. 

“Just a small accident. Jane here,” She points to the woman on the ground, “was running the bases so we could practice our bunt coverage defense when her and Chummy collided.” She nods to the woman, who flinches with sympathy to Jane. “Jane dislocated her shoulder on impact but I popped it back into place.” 

“You what?” Lucille bends down to Jane and moves everyone’s hands away from her to begin examining her shoulder. “Someone should have came to get me before you took it into your own hands, Ms. Dyer. You could have torn ligaments.” Lucille throws a glare at Valerie where she now stands looking down at her. 

“Whoa, now,” Valerie starts. She throws her hands up in a ‘slow down’ gesture. “I am a trained nurse. I know how to pop a shoulder back in place. I had to do much worse in the army.” Valerie throws back. She doesn’t like to be treated like she doesn’t know what she is doing.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we aren’t in the army right now.” Lucille murmurs some questions to Jane to ask about her injury. She manipulates the shoulder around a few times and stands up when she is done. She helps Jane stand. “It seems you were right this time. In the future, I would appreciate it if you left my job to me.” She turns from Valerie and guides Jane to her office so she can find a sling to put her shoulder in and some ice to help the inevitable inflammation. 

The team is left on the field gapping between Valerie and Lucille. They had yet to see any tension on the field, besides Jenny and her own angst, and feel a thrill at something interrupting the now mundane practices.

“Who does she think has been taking care of everyone’s injuries until she showed up today?” Valerie asks no one as she shakes her head and heads back towards centerfield when Coach Crane yells at everyone to stop playing in the dirt like children and back to work. 

****


	3. Chapter 3

Lucille helps Jane onto the examining bed. Lucille asks her a few more questions about the level of pain she is experiencing and if she feels like something else might be wrong with her shoulder. 

“It actually feels a lot better since Val-” Jane pauses. Lucille looks up and tries to adjust her face into a friendly expression instead of a stormy one. Guilt for how she reacted is already starting to bleed through. “It feels much better than before. Just a dull ache.” Jane finishes meekly. 

“Very well. I’ll try to find a sling in these supplies and set you up with an ice compression. I’ll go ahead and give you some Naproxen. The sooner we get that in your system the faster you’ll heal.” Lucille rummages through the tubs of supplies that have been stacked in the corner. She will have to take time to organize all of this. There is no order to it. “We will do a few special stretches and exercises at the practice this evening. We will try to keep your shoulder as loose as we can and the inflammation down.” 

Lucille finally locates an arm sling and helps Jane into it. She adjusts the straps, gives her the ice pack, and sets her up with some medicine and a cup of water. They make their way back to the field. Jane goes to sit in the dugout and Lucille sets up on the sidelines. She leans against the fence and watches the women practice. 

She bends down to her bag at her feet and pulls out her sunglasses. It is pushing ten o’clock now and the sun is peeking above the stadium. She looks out to the women where Coach Winnie is hitting to the defense while Coach Crane and Coach Julienne yell different plays. 

Lucille feels her cheeks warm. She blames it on the sun but she knows it is because she is thinking about how she acted when she saw Jane on the ground and realized she was not around to do the job she was there for. She shouldn’t have shown herself, especially on the first day. Not only that, she snapped at the captain of the team. 

She looks out to centerfield where the woman is already looking at her. They both look away. Lucille already knows she definitely has to fix that situation. She still feels a bit of anger at the situation, but it is at herself, not Valerie, she realizes. It turns out the center fielder is very qualified to pop a shoulder back in place. 

At that thought, Coach Winnie hits a hard line drive to right center field. Valerie chases the ball down and easily picks it up with her glove. Coach Crane is shouting, “Go three! Go three!” while Trixie (Lucille remembers her clearly because she is wearing bright red lipstick to practice softball in), is waving her hands between second base and third as a cutoff for Valerie’s throw to third. Valerie, however, throws it over her head and it lands in the third baseman's glove, right on target. 

Coach Crane doesn’t say anything, nor does she smile, but she nods head once in approval. There are chirps of, “good throw, Val.” throughout the field. That was an excellent throw, Lucille thinks. She made it look effortlessly, at that. Valerie looks over where Lucille is still watching her. Lucille clears her throat and looks away, embarrassed. 

****

After practicing their defence, they break into small groups to go through different batting stations. Some are working on the tee, some are hitting weighted sand balls with heavy bats, some are getting pitched to by the machine in the batting cage, and so on. Valerie, Barbara, and Trixie make up their group. When they have the option of choosing their groups, they always team up. 

Trixie looks at Valerie, waiting for her to realize it is her turn on the tee. “Is your plan to keep staring at the trainer so she knows she hurt your feelings and she apologizes?” 

“What?” Valerie asks and then shakes her head. 

“It is your turn, Val.” Barbara says. Barbara is always the softer side of Trixie.

“I am not staring.” Valerie shakes her head again and steps up the tee with her bat in her hand. “She didn’t hurt my feelings either. It was just a misunderstanding. She has probably forgotten about it already.” She winds up and focuses on the ball, ready to swing-

“The tension between you two has me by the throat, _Ms. Dyer_ , she hasn’t forgotten.” Trixie laughs loudly when Valerie swings and completely misses the ball. Barbara tries to swallow her laugh.

__

Valerie’s cheeks flame. It is because she missed the ball, not because of the tension Trixie is talking about. The tension that most certainly is not there.  
“Let me focus, will ya?” Valerie replies, cheeks still red. She doesn’t look over to Lucille the rest of practice. When practice is wrapped up, she rushes to grab her bag and new clothing items and skips the locker room. She leaves the stadium in her practice clothes. She doesn’t want to risk running into Lucille, even though she already knows she needs to apologize to her for stepping out of place, but she really doesn’t want to give Trixie anything else to tease her about.

In her rush, she misses Lucille trying to track her down to apologize. 

****

Valerie walks into the bar and heads for the upstairs to change. She has to work a shift from 1pm to 6:30pm and then rush back for strength and conditioning practice. She changes into her standard black button up and black slacks. Elsie prefers her staff to wear all black and blend into the background. Valerie is just glad she isn’t expected to dress skimpy and flirt with the customers. Her grandmother is a newly made feminist, however. 

She hurries back down to the bar and ties her apron around her waist. It is in the middle of the day, so for the most part she will be acting as a waitress. ‘Elsie’s Bar’ is well known for their excellent food and that is how they are able to stay open during the day, not just in the evening. 

Valerie lets the droll of her shift occupy her mind for a while, but her mind drifts back to a certain athletic trainer. Valerie has never shied away from standing up for herself or taking things into her own hands when she can, but she can’t help feeling guilty. Valerie is used to being well liked, and it doesn’t sit well with her; thinking someone out there might have negative feelings for her. 

She makes the decision to apologize to her tonight at practice and lets that thought calm her down. It doesn’t stop her from thinking about how Lucille looked casually leaning against the fence watching their practice with the sun seemingly putting a spotlight on her. 

****

Valerie changes in the locker room from her bar outfit to slick black athletic leggings and a long sleeve gray dri-fit shirt. She quickly ties the hair that is long enough back behind her head and lets the rest fall at her neck. She probably wouldn't have chopped all her hair off a couple months ago if she knew she would be playing softball again. She ties her tennis shoes and rushes down the stairs to the weight room. The room is under the stadium, almost like a dungeon. The organization remodeled it before the team took over the stadium with new carpet, floor to ceiling mirrors, and updated equipment. 

Valerie is the last one to arrive. The players are in the open area with floor mats stretching and chatting while the coaches go over their routine for the evening. Valerie looks around for Lucille and sees her stretching Jane’s shoulder out. Valerie winces and hurries to sit on the mat before she is spotted. 

Coach Julienne clears her throat and that is all it takes to get everyone’s attention. “Before we start, we want to share some good news.” She looks around, making sure everyone is watching her. “Mrs. Buckle called me right before you all showed up to tell me she worked out a day with the University of Cincinnati’s manager to have a scrimmage between our teams.” Players clap and cheer at that. Valerie smiles wide, practice has been getting a bit repetitive. It will be nice to see if they’re any good at playing against another team. “It’ll be this Saturday. The scrimmage starts at five. We will still have practice following the scrimmage but we will not have a morning practice. This is only a college team. I know most of you just left college within the last couple years, but we must expect to play at a higher level than them. This scrimmage will be a good show of where we are and I expect all of you to take it seriously, as if it is a real game that counts.”

Coach Crane cuts in, “We all know what happened to the U.S. Women’s Soccer team when they lost to a JV boy’s team. They win the world cup and that is still the top comment under their posts. We cannot let ourselves be beat before we even start.” 

No pressure, Valerie thinks. She already has butterflies for the scrimmage. She has missed this feeling before a game. Coach Buckle passes out sheets of paper for everyone. “This is your workout routine for the night. You can work in groups or solo. Each sheet has a different order of the workouts so there shouldn’t be a traffic jam at any of the machines. Push yourself, but within your bounds.”

“Don’t forget to utilize our athletic trainer, Lucille.” She gestures to her, Lucille nods back. “If you have any tightness or pain, please see her. Lets begin.” Coach Julienne claps once and walks to the desk in the corner with the rest of the coaching staff trailing after her. 

Valerie looks down and sees that cardio is first on her list. She walks over to the treadmill and turns it on. She doesn’t mind running. She learned to love it between being an athlete all her life and enlisting. It clears her mind better than anything. Except for maybe a cigarette. She hooks up her headphones and puts on her workout playlist then threads the cord through her shirt so it won’t get in her way. She needs Airpods, she thinks. The treadmills are lined against one wall with mirrors so she can stare at herself or look through it to see behind her. She sees that Lucille is leaning against the opposite wall. They connect eyes in the mirror. Valerie offers a small turn of her lips and a nod. Lucille nods back and looks over to Hilda beside her, who is asking for extra help stretching out her legs. 

Valerie turns her music louder and focuses on the controls of the treadmill. She starts out at a slow pace but when she catches Lucille standing back up from stretching Hilda, something makes her turn the speed higher. The voice in the back of her head is telling her she is going to wear herself out before she even moves to the weight lifting part of the workout, but she keeps the same pace until she has finished 2.5 miles. She uses the final half mile to cool off. 

The rest of the conditioning happens in the same manner. She catches Lucille’s eye and pushes herself harder. Trixie stops her at one point by taking her headphone out of her ear and asking her why she is showing off tonight but Valerie just shrugs and shoves the headphone back in her ear. She doesn’t know why she is doing it. She doesn’t have anything to prove to Lucille. 

Everyone finishes their routine by 9pm. The team ends in a huddle with the coaches reminding them tomorrow is the start of the media campaign and to come ready. 

“Are we still coming over to look at some of your outfits for the media?” Barbara asks Valerie on their walk up the stairs to the locker room. Trixie is beside them, groaning at every stair she takes.

“Yeah, yeah. I just need to shower real quick. I don’t want to ruin my Jeep’s seats with a big sweat stain.” Barbara scrunches her nose at that. “Just let yourselves in. Trix knows where I keep the spare key.” She looks over to Trixie, who is now steadily groaning.

Valerie pulls out her fresh clothes from her bag; a pair of light gray sweats, a blue nike sweatshirt, and clean undergarments. She reaches in her locker for her shower caddy and towel and carries everything to the showers.

Her muscles are protesting every move she makes. She is just short of groaning like Trixie. It is only Monday, why did she push herself like that? 

By the time she gets out of the shower, everyone has cleared out and went to their homes or second jobs. She occasionally works a few hours at night but she never works a full shift. She doesn’t know how a few of the women work a night shift and then make it to practice in the morning. Their only time to sleep is in the afternoon between practices. They work just as hard, if not harder, as a professional men's team but get paid dust. Valerie bets none of their male counterparts have to work a second job to get by. 

Once dressed, Valerie grabs her things and heads for the locker room door. She swings the door open and feels it hit something. She peeks around to the other side and sees she hit Lucille with the door. “I am so sorry! I promise I didn't mean to do that.” That last thing she wants is Lucille thinking she hit her on purpose. 

“No, no, it’s okay. It barely touched me.” Lucille reassures. She glances down at the hands on her upper arms. 

Valerie didn’t even realize she reached out and grabbed the woman. She hurriedly takes a step back, letting her hands drop and clears her suddenly dry throat.

Silence follows. They dodge each other’s eyes and then finally both begin to speak at the same time, tripping over each other. Valerie nods for Lucille to start.

“I am not stalking you, I promise.” Lucille gestures to where she was waiting for Valerie to walk out of the locker room. She had been pacing for well over twenty minutes waiting for her. She knows now that Valerie had showered. Her short hair is slicked back and she smells fresh. Lucille refocuses, “I just couldn’t bear going home without apologizing to you for what happened this morning. I was out of line. I shouldn’t have assumed you would be the type to pop a woman’s shoulder in place if you didn’t know what you were doing.”

“You don’t need to-” Valerie goes to interrupt her but Lucille shakes her head. 

“No, no. I do. I am sorry. When you said you were a nurse I should’ve backed off. I think I was just embarrassed that I wasn’t there when it happened. It is literally my job to be there when someone gets hurt. I didn’t make a very good impression on my first day. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” Lucille takes a breath and looks up to signal she is done with her small speech.

“I need to apologize, too. I knew you could’ve been there, had we sent someone after you. It is not like I could’ve forgotten you were there.” Valerie’s eyes widen when she realizes what she said.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Lucille asks, ready to be offended.

“Nothing bad! Just that I-” Valerie flounders. “Just that we had talked not long before it happened. I didn’t forget that quickly that we now have a trainer. I was out of line. I should have waited.” She thinks back to Lucille's apology. “Besides, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Coach Winnie chose an unlucky time to show you around. You seem like a fine and capable athletic trainer.” 

Lucille smiles down at her feet, feeling relieved. “So, nurse in the army? That is very admirable.” 

“Eh,” Valerie runs a hand through her wet hair. “It was the best option for me at the time.” She puts her hands in her pockets and rocks on her heels, thinking of what to do now. She nods her head towards the exit. “I’ll walk you to your car. This stadium gets scary when you’re here by yourself.” 

They both turn to leave, walking side by side. “Thank you. I probably couldn’t have found my way back to the parking lot. I feel constantly lost in this city.”

“Are you not from around here?” Valerie asks.

“No. I just moved here from Columbus. I only got here just this past weekend. I don’t quite have everything mapped out.” Lucille laughs at herself.

“I’ve lived here all my life. Cincinnati is a lot like a small town, despite its city looks. You’ll catch on fast enough. If you ever need any help, let me know. I know this place better than anyone. Especially the best places to eat.” Valerie holds the exit door open for Lucille to walk out first. It is dark outside except for the light posts scattered about. 

Lucille pulls out her keys and leads them to where she parked earlier. “I’ll keep that in mind. Google can’t really tell you the secrets of the city.” 

“I’ll tell you the biggest secret. My gran and I own a bar downtown called ‘Elsie’s’. The whole team ends up there every Saturday night. You should come.” Valerie offers before she can stop herself.

“I am not much of a drinker.” Lucille explains.

Valerie shrugs, “Me either, not after what it did to my parents.” She shakes her head and Lucille knows not to question that further. “I own a bar and don’t drink, I know. A lot of us girls don’t. It doesn’t go well with our demanding schedules. They let their hair down on Saturdays, though.” She laughs to herself. “We have excellent food and a great selection of fountain drinks. The best potato wedges around, mind you.” 

“Trixie did warn me about getting between you and potatoes.” 

Valerie rolls her eyes, “Don’t listen to anything she says.”

“Well, you’ve sold me on the food. I might stop by.” She hits the unlock button on her key fob and her car lights up. 

Valerie lets out a low whistle, “This is your’s?” She gestures to the car. At Lucille’s nod, she whistles again. “You have a 2020 124 Fiat Spider?” She asks with disbelief. She has never seen one in person. She lets her hand hover above the red paint of the hood, not daring to touch it.

“My father gifted it to me when I graduated.” When Valerie’s eyes shoot to her, she explains, “He is a doctor.” She shrugs. “He almost took the car back, though, when he found out I was moving here.” 

“She is beautiful. I bet she rides like a dream.” Lucille only giggles as a reply. They are silent again. Valerie looks to Lucille, “You can call me Valerie.” Valerie says, seemingly out of the blue. Lucille gives her a questioning look, “Back at the field. You called me Ms. Dyer. Valerie will do.” 

Lucille blushes. “That was in the heat of the moment. Okay. Valerie. You can call me Lucille, of course.” 

Valerie grins down at her feet. They’re still standing beside the open door of Lucille’s car. Neither wanting to say bye, but both knowing they need to. 

“Alright, well I better pop off. Trixie and Barbara will be wondering if I got lost on the way to my own home.” Valerie straightens herself and starts to back away with a light pat to the top of the car. She puts her hands in the pockets of her sweats and continues to walk backwards until Lucille replies.

“Very well. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” Lucille smiles once more and gets in her car. She watches Valerie walk to her own vehicle. She is relieved that everything has been resolved between them now.

****

Valerie walks into her already unlocked apartment to see Barbara and Trixe on the couch. “Sorry for the hold up. Lucille caught me when I was leaving. She apologized, even though she didn’t need to. We got to talking.” She smiles to herself while gathering her dirty clothes from her bag to throw in the laundry. 

Trixie and Barbara share a secret look. “I am glad you two kissed and made up.” Trixie says with a smirk in her voice. They can hear Valerie choking on nothing down the hall and giggle. 

****

Lucille just finished her nightly routine and she pulls back the covers to her bed. She reaches over to her nightstand to grab her phone. She looks at the still unread text from Cyril wishing her luck on her first day and his missed call.

She feels guilty for not speaking to him since yesterday afternoon, but she has been busy, she reasons. She supposes she could call or at least text him now, but she falls asleep thinking about legs pounding into a treadmill and wet hair slicked back before she can contact him. 

****


	4. Chapter 4

The rest of the week, Lucille focuses on adjusting to the new city and her new job. She falls right into the two-a-day practice schedule with ease. She even builds a few tentative friendships with a couple of women on the team. Her and Coach Crane have particularly hit it off, which leaves the players in awe. They thought only Barbara had that power. 

The main friendship she has made so far, however, is Valerie. Even despite their rocky start. They have been able to move on from it completely. After walking her to her car after that first evening practice, Valerie has walked her every single night since. 

The night before, Lucille had told Valerie she did not need to walk her to her car and that she must be exhausted from practice. Valerie only said, “We’ve all been new somewhere before once and this gives me a chance to answer any questions or concerns you may have. Besides, if I were too tired to even walk a friend to her car, then I am not in good enough shape to play professional softball.” She’d said cockily with a wink, a wink that played over in Lucille’s mind that night. 

Someone gently taps on Lucille’s shoulder and she turns from where she is stretching Jane’s shoulder. “Could you stretch my legs out after you are finished with Jane? They are tighter than a dead rubber snake.” Lucille nods and smiles to Chummy. She never quite understands the other woman’s little sayings. 

She pats Jane’s shoulder to let her know she is finished. She is able to play in today’s scrimmage. Jane is a bench player, but her main role on the team is as a pinch runner, so even if her shoulder isn’t in tip top shape, Lucille is confident she will be okay. 

“Just lay down here and I’ll stretch you out, Chummy.” Chummy clambers down to the mat Lucille had set up on the sidelines for this purpose. Lucille takes a step back when it seems Chummy might somehow take her to the ground, too. “On your back, please. Try to keep your leg as straight as you can and let me know when your leg is as far as it will go.” Lucille grabs her left leg at the calf and starts to push it forward towards Chummy. She pushes down on her knee to help her keep it straight. Chummy’s legs are so long Lucille doesn’t even have to bend over her to push. She moves to the right leg when she feels Chummy loosen up and have more mobility in her left.

Valerie watches from a few feet away. She hasn’t admitted it to anyone, but ever since pushing herself so hard at the beginning of the week, she has been dreadfully sore. The soreness has just piled on top of soreness as the week went on. She hasn’t asked Lucille for help yet, but today is an important scrimmage and she needs to be able to play to the best of her ability. She doesn’t even know why she is nervous to ask Lucille to stretch her, it is her job after all.

She looks over to the other team stretching and warming up. They are a couple years or more younger than her. That may not seem like much but Valerie knows that could give them the edge over her. She takes a deep breath and walks over to where Lucille is just finishing with Chummy. 

“Would you mind giving me a hand with stretching, Lucille? I am not as young as I once was.” 

Chummy chortles from the ground. “I’m older and I’ve had a baby! You’re a young whipper snapper.” Lucille and Valerie laugh and they each grab one of Chummy’s hands to help her up. “Well, I’ll be. I feel so loose I’ll be able to do the splits at first when Hilda throws it too short from third.” Hilda hears this comment and the two of them start bickering back and forth jokingly.

They watch Chummy lumber off before Lucille turns to Valerie, “Anything specific needs stretched, old lady?”

“Hey, now! That is no way to talk to your elders.” They both laugh again. “My throwing arm and my legs are my ticket on this team. We better start with those.” 

“As you wish. Give me your golden arm.” Lucille giggles at herself as Valerie rolls her eyes good naturedly. She offers her right arm as Lucille reaches out for it. “Keep your elbow as straight as you can while I manipulate your shoulder and be sure to tell me if you feel any pain. I don’t want you to be sore from the stretching itself, just looser.” 

Valerie nods her head and does as she is instructed. Lucille’s hands feel as if she left them above a hot stove before touching her skin. She feels the collar of her uniform get tighter. Valerie turns to watch the other team take the field to practice some defense. In high school and college, watching the other team warm up was part of her pre game ritual and she uses this as a distraction from Lucille.

“Nervous?” Lucille asks, noticing the clamminess of Valerie’s skin and her nervous glances to the other team. 

It takes a second for Valerie to realize Lucille is talking about the upcoming scrimmage, and not herself making Valerie nervous. “Yes. The day I stop being nervous before a game is the day I stop playing.” 

“I always tried to avoid the locker room at my last training job. The men would be in the bathroom before every game throwing up or-” Lucille pauses and flinches, “you know. And they did not try to hide it.” She finishes. 

“Frances and Cynthia both have already thrown up. I think I’d avoid our locker rooms on game days, too.” They look over to where Frances is sitting on an upside down softball bucket with her head between her legs, taking deep breaths. Hilda is rubbing her back, trying to calm her. 

“How’s the shoulder feeling now?” Lucille releases her arm and Valerie moves it around. Valerie nods her approval. “Okay, if you just get down on the mat, I’ll stretch your legs.” Valerie nods again and sits on the mat. She is already regretting asking Lucille to stretch her. “Lay back. I will do to you as I did to Chummy. It’ll be much more graceful, though, since your legs alone aren’t as tall as I am.” 

Valerie smiles up at Lucille and locks her hands together on her stomach. Lucille grabs her leg and lifts it up until her socked calf is resting on her shoulder. She puts her hands on Valerie’s knee and pushes forward, stretching her leg. Valerie lets her head roll to the side, watching Lucille above her becoming too much. They both stay silent as Lucille switches legs. 

Valerie counts fifty-seven breaths before Lucille is done stretching the second leg. Lucille pats her calf one time as she gently lays her leg back to the ground and stands up straight, “Up you go.” 

Valerie stands and dusts off the dirt that isn’t there. “Thank you. I’m ready to kick some college kids’ behinds now.” She adjusts her tucked in jersey and softball belt at her waist. 

“You can hold your ‘thank yous’ for after you do it.” Lucille notices Valerie’s subtle cleft chin when she smiles. 

Coach Julienne calls for everyone to take a seat in the dugout. Lucille mouths, “Good luck.” Valerie nods her head and turns to jog to the dugout. 

“Today is a test, ladies. I know you all are ready. We take the field first, as the home team. Patsy is going to pitch an excellent game and you all are going to be there in the field to back her up.” Coach Julienne starts.

“Remember what we have worked on the past month on defense. Communication is key. Know where you’re going with your throw before the ball is even hit to you. Cheer on your teammates and stay encouraged. We got this.” Coach Winnie gives a cheesy fist bump after her short speech. She is very passionate about defense. 

“Watch your base coaches when you hit the ball, not where the ball is landing. That is the easiest way to get thrown out.” Coach Buckle adds. 

Everyone looks to Coach Crane for her advice, but all she does is cross her arms with a severe look on her face and say, “You all know what to do.” 

“Time to take the field!” Coach Julienne claps and they gather in a tight huddle to break off and run to their positions. 

Valerie feels the excitement and nerves pumping like electricity through her veins. Her, Jenny, and Barbara pass a ball around in the outfield to keep their arms warm while Patsy throws a few warm up pitches at the mound. 

The umpire behind the plate shouts, “Play ball!” and the Cincinnati River Roses start their first inning of the organization's existence. There are a few scattered cheers from the bleachers. There is hardly a crowd, only a few parents of the college players are on the away team’s side and Chummy’s husband and child are on the home side. There is, however, an older woman Coach Julienne introduced as Monica Joan, or MJ, cheering wildly right above the River Rose’s dugout. Coach Julienne said MJ is almost like an adoptive sister and she is already a super fan of their team.

The game keeps going back and forth until the fifth inning when the River Roses start to pull away with the lead. Valerie has fielded a few balls in center field and she has two hits in the game. She scored both times. She only popped out to right field once. All in all, the team is working well together and they end up winning with a score of 3 to 6. 

They line up to shake hands with the other team and congregate together back at the dugout where the coaches tell them good job and allow them a thirty minute break before they are to meet back on the field for practice.

“What a rush!” Barbara breathes out. “I can’t wait for games to start.”

“Games are so much more fun than practice, especially when you win.” Trixie starts. “I dread hearing what Coach Crane has to say at practice, though. She took notes the whole game.”

“It can’t be that bad! We hardly had any defensive errors and I think almost everyone got at least one hit.” Barbara replies.

“But, they are a college team. Like they said earlier, we have to play at a higher level than them. We must not get too excited.” Valerie takes a sip of water and then ruffles through her bag, looking for her hairbrush. She needs to fix her short hair. It is sweaty and sticking out every other way from her batting helmet. 

“On that note, I can’t wait for a drink at Elsie’s tonight.” Trixie nods over to where Lucille is retaping Jenny’s ankle for their practice, “Is Lucille coming tonight?”

Valerie nods, “I believe so, I invited her. I’ll probably offer to drive her over, since she doesn’t know where it is.” Trixie almost suggests that Valerie just have Lucille follow her Jeep in her own vehicle, but she lets it go. 

“Good, we all need to get to know her a bit better. Don’t you think, Val?” 

****

The practice ends up being a walk through of the mistakes they made during the scrimmage and the areas they need to get stronger in. Overall, the players leave the field feeling optimistic and light. 

Valerie walks over to the corner of the dugout that Lucille has claimed as her own. She is packing up all her tapes and wraps she used on players throughout the day. Valerie pauses on her way over to briefly admire the small smile Lucille seemed to always have on her face. It is just a slight quirk of her lips, Valerie thinks, but it makes her look warm. 

“I hope you haven’t forgotten about my offer of hanging out at my bar with the team tonight.” 

Lucille looks over her shoulder to where Valerie is biting her lip, waiting for her answer. “I haven’t forgotten about the chance to eat the best potato wedges, no.” She finishes packing the last of her things into her medical bag and straightens her body, offering Valerie a smile. 

“I promise you won’t be disappointed.” Valerie slides her hands into the back pockets of her softball pants, suddenly feeling nervous. “I thought maybe, I mean- if you don’t mind waiting, after I shower and change I can drive you over to the bar myself.” Lucille doesn’t break eye contact while Valerie speaks, and it flusters her even further. “It’s just- the bar is downtown and if you don’t know where you’re going, it is easy to miss. I promise I’ll bring you back to your car as soon as you are ready to go home.” 

Lucille smiles gently at the stumbling team captain. “I don’t mind waiting. I can organize a few things in my office until you’re finished. The team doesn’t mind a member of the staff crashing their party?” Lucille asks.

“No, no. The girls are all really excited to get to know you. You’re one of us, chick.” Valerie winks and nods her head towards the tunnel, leading the way to the locker room and trainer’s room. There’s that wink again, Lucille thinks. She has never witnessed someone able to wink so smoothly and it not make her cringe. 

They part ways at the office door with Valerie promising to come get her when she is finished. There is excited chatter around the locker room as the women clean up and get ready to go out for the night. Trixie is waving the curling iron in her hand around as she justifies why she’s doing a full face of makeup, fixing her hair, and putting on a clubbing outfit just to go to Elsie’s while the rest of the team giggles at her antics. Valerie smiles to herself. She loves this team. 

Valerie showers and brushes her teeth as fast as she can, not wanting to leave Lucille waiting too long. She dodges the clouds of perfumes and hair sprays from the other women as she goes back to her locker to put her clothes on over her sports bra and underwear. She brought her nicer pair of dark jeans to wear with her black sleeved baseball tee and white converse. Trixie shouts at her for looking like she is about to star in the movie “Sandlot” to go out but Valerie only shrugs. She will never make Trixie happy with her style. She runs her towel through her hair one more time to dry it as much as she can and tops her look off with a layer of chapstick. She fiddles with her clothing one more time in the mirror before grabbing her bag and heading for Lucille’s office. 

“Ready set?” She asks Lucille, leaning against the frame of the open door. 

“Sure, just let me lock up.” They walk to Valerie’s Jeep in comfortable silence.

Lucille’s phone vibrates in her hand and she unlocks it to see a text from Cyril. He asked how their first game went. She quickly types back, “Fine. They won, no injuries to report. I’m going straight to bed soon.” She doesn’t know why she lies to him, it isn’t like she is doing anything wrong. She turns her phone on airplane mode and puts it in her back pocket. 

“I don’t know how social of a person you are, but as soon as you want to go home, just let me know and we will be back in a jiffy.” Valerie reassures.

“Thank you. I’m sure it’ll be fun. Everyone has been lovely so far.” They climb into the Jeep and Valerie pulls out of the parking lot. She starts to get nervous that her ball equipment might smell. She cracks both windows just a bit. 

A radio station plays quietly in the background as they both struggle to find something to say, the silence becoming less and less comfortable. 

“Can I ask why you aren’t a practicing nurse?” Lucille has been wondering this ever since she learned of Valerie’s profession. 

“I’ve only ever been a nurse in the army. I think it warped my view of it forever. There was a lot of curing, not a lot of caring, you know? We didn’t have time to care. I think I’d be a nurse somewhere if I didn’t have the bar and this softball opportunity. All this just kind of fell in my lap when I came back to Cincinnati.” She glances over to Lucille, who is turned slightly, watching her, before focusing back on the traffic in front of her. “Don’t get me wrong, I loved nursing. But I love what I’m doing now even more.”

Lucille nods with a small smile. “I admire you doing what makes you happy.” 

Valerie glances over to Lucille quickly, hearing a sad note in her voice. “Are you doing what makes you happy?” Valerie shakes her head quickly, “I’m sorry, that is a personal thing to ask.” 

Lucille stays quiet a few seconds longer, watching as the headlights of passing cars makes Valerie’s pale skin shine. “No, I’m doing what makes me happy. It just hasn’t been easy. My parents had something more similar to their own life planned for me. My dad is a surgeon and my mom is a head nurse. They wanted me to have an important title and work in their hospital. Not a mere athletic trainer that works on the sidelines with airheaded jocks.” She pauses, “No offense. Their opinion, not mine.” 

“None take.” Valerie flashes a smile. “Well. It is admirable that you are creating your own path. That sounds like a lot of pressure. What do your parents think of your job now?”

Lucille smiles sadly, “They haven’t contacted me since I’ve moved.” 

“I’m sorry. They should be proud as punch of you.” Valerie is glad Lucille is coming out with them tonight, she must be so lonely since moving to a new city. She vows to herself to help as much as she can.

“I’m proud of myself and that is enough.” She smiles to herself, knowing she means that. “Why the army?”

Valerie grips the steering wheel tightly and then relaxes her hands quickly. “After college, I had all these student loans and responsibilities just on the horizon, and I wasn’t ready. I’ve worked all my life and paid for everything I have, but there are still some things that come with adulthood that you aren’t prepared for, you know?” Lucille nods along, letting Valerie’s voice surround her in the small space. “I wasn’t prepared to get my own place and a big job that wasn’t the bar. I wasn’t prepared to stay in Cincinnati forever where I didn’t have anything or anyone. It has always been just me and my gran. We both needed a chance to grow. Separately.” She thinks back to how far her and her gran have come since. “Mainly, I’m not one to sit with my feet up, so I joined up.” She laughs, “I have no big patriotic story, or anything like that. A bit more depressing.” 

Lucille stays quiet while she digests what she just learned about Valerie. It seems the other woman doesn’t have parents, or family for that matter, outside of her grandmother. She talks about it like having her parents in her life was never an option for her. 

Valerie laughs self consciously, afraid she shared too much, “We are almost there. Let's just shake this pity party off.” She jokes, doing a little jig in her seat. She hates feeling pity.

They’re both quiet while Valerie parks her vehicle. She looks over to Lucille to see if she has scared her off. Lucille meets her eyes confidently, “Well, I for one feel no pity for the team captain of a professional sports team.” 

“Damn right.” They both laugh and climb out of the Jeep, heading for the entrance. Valerie wonders how Lucille came up with something perfect to say to make her feel better. “Most of the girls are probably still in the locker room getting all made up by Trixie.” She holds the door open for Lucille and follows her in. 

Lucille takes in the bar setting. The best way to describe the vibe of Elsie’s Bar is by comparing it to the feeling you get when you walk into a fast food chain restaurant that hasn’t yet updated the building since the 90’s. Walking in, Lucille feels like she went back to the 1960’s. The style is outdated, but everything is new and clean. It’s a conundrum she can’t quite wrap her mind around, but she loves it. It is a comfortable atmosphere. “This is charming, Valerie.”

Valerie smiles, flattered. This bar is her first home. “Thank you. We remodeled it recently, but Gran wanted to keep it all the same style. It turned out better than I thought it would. Most bars are going modern, but this works for us. The customers love it.” 

Elsie comes out the kitchen door at once, snapping her rag at a man that is complaining to a waitress about how long he has waited for his food, “Quiet, Larry. You can’t complain about waiting for your food when we are fixing you something up that isn’t even on the menu. No other place would deal with you.” The man settles down, properly chastised. 

Valerie leads Lucille closer to the bar counter, catching her grandmother’s attention. “Hey Gran. Keeping everyone in line, yeah?” 

“I’ve never seen a grown man be so particular about his food!” Larry shrinks even further in his stool, embarrassed. “Valerie.” She says warmly and reaches for her granddaughter, giving her a full hug and pinches her cheek. 

“Oh, stop, Gran.” Valerie whines, slapping lightly at her grandmother’s hand. 

Lucille lets out a giggle. Elsie’s eyes look from Valerie to her. “And who is this beautiful woman, Valerie?” 

Valerie feels her cheeks turn red, and not from the pinch she just suffered. “Gran, this is Lucille. She is the team’s athletic trainer. She is new in town so I thought I’d show her the city’s hidden gem.” She pauses, “And then we came here.” Elsie’s tsks at her granddaughter, slapping her in the arm. 

Lucille reaches out a hand for Elsie, but Elsie grabs her for a hug instead. “Lucille. Beautiful name. You can call me Elsie. Or Gran. Mostly everyone calls me Gran.” She finishes, releasing Lucille. Valerie covers her eyes with her palm and groans. 

“Very nice to meet you. I’ve heard great things about you and your food.” Lucille smiles. This sets Elsie in motion, pulling out a notepad and pen.

“Oh, please, please. Make yourself comfortable! I’ll put your order in and then you can tell me about how Valerie did at her scrimmage. She is awful at telling me how she played, always has been. I don’t bother asking her anymore.” Elsie takes their orders and walks back to the kitchen. The rest of the team starts to stream in.

“Sorry ‘bout her, she is a little much.” Valerie says, nodding her head to the kitchen. She grabs her apron under the counter and ties it at her waist. 

“I see where you get your charm from.” Before Valerie can respond, Trixie and Barbara flank Lucille at each side of her and start shouting out their orders. 

It is chaos from that moment forward. The team shuffles around Lucille, each taking turns getting to know her. Lucille feels like she is conducting job interviews. Cynthia and Frances seem to take a liking to Lucille, all three having softer voices and relaxed personalities compared to the rest of the team. Chummy had already left with her husband. Barbara left after her when her boyfriend dropped by to pick her up, causing Trixie to up her own intake of her alcohol. Now Trixie is hanging off different men throughout the bar even though she won’t end up sleeping with any of them. Jane is asleep facedown on a table in the corner, always the lightweight, and Valerie and Hilda are armwrestling at the counter with Patsy cheering them on. Valerie and Hilda always end up competing over something, Valerie representing the army and Hilda representing the air force. 

Valerie finally slams the back of Hilda’s hand on the counter, winning the match. “Ha! Hooah!” she shouts just as Lucille walks over the counter. She feels her ears warm at being caught acting like a fool by Lucille.

“I hope I don’t have to examine any injured throwing arms after this.” Lucille jokes, eyeing Hilda and Valerie.

“No worries, we used our left hands!” Hilda reassures. Patsy distracts her with her goading. Valerie bites her lip and shrugs. 

“Look!” Frances shouts and points to the TV on the wall. The local 11 o’clock news is playing a feature on the Cincinnati River Roses, reporting their scrimmage victory.

“There’s my Val!” Her grandmother gets teary eyed, watching Valerie’s interview from earlier in the week. Valerie tries to hide her face. She doesn’t like the spotlight. The team cheers and gets rowdier with the excitement of being in the news. There’s even a few shots of them practicing.

“That is quite exciting. You’re making history.” Lucille says quietly to Valerie. Next the news channel talks about the democratic debate that is happening the next night. It shows shots of each nominee. 

“I get this little shiver every time I think about the first woman president.” Valerie says to Hilda, Patsy, and Lucille.

“That’s gay, Valerie. And that’s coming from me, a gay!” Patsy laughs at herself, slapping her knee. Her cheeks are flushed from the four empty beers sitting in front of her.

Valerie feels like her ears have caught fire and starts to defend herself, from what she doesn’t know, when Cynthia suggests her and Hilda better start rounding everyone up to take home. Valerie nods her agreement, everyone is starting to get a little wild, besides Jane, who is still passed out.

The sober teammates start to round everyone up. Valerie walks Trixie upstairs to her old bedroom. She wipes her makeup off for her, knowing she won’t hear the end of it if she lets Trixie sleep in it, and tucks her into bed with a glass of water on the nightstand. Trixie tries to grab her phone to text Barbara, but Valerie takes it from her, turning it off and hiding it for the night. Trixie doesn’t need to say anything she would regret.

Valerie makes her way back down the stairs where Hilda hikes Jane up over her shoulder and packs her like a sack of potatoes. She is pretty badass, Valerie thinks, for ex air force, she giggles. They get Patsy tucked into Cynthia’s car, and Hilda lays Jane in the backseat of Frances’ car. Valerie watches everyone drive off and turns to go back in the bar to say bye to her grandmother, grab her keys, and Lucille. 

Her Gran and Lucille are talking softly at the counter. Valerie is glad to see them getting on well. 

“Everyone got plastered in less than two hours, that must be a record.” Valerie says. “That, or we all are just getting older.” 

“In my old age, I can just get a sniff of a drink and get a buzz. I’ll be hungover for the next week.” Lucille giggles at Elsie.

“Ready, Lucille?” Valerie asks. 

“Sure. It was lovely to meet you, Elsie. This place is already my favorite in Cincinnati.”

“Likewise, Lucille. You’re welcome anytime. I know you must need a stiff one after looking after my Val all week.” Valerie scoffs and corrals Lucille towards the exit before her gran can embarrass her anymore.

“I hope tonight didn’t scare you off from joining us in the future.” Valerie says as she starts the car and pulls out. 

“It was very enlightening.” Lucille jokes. “No, I had the most fun I’ve had since moving here. Maybe since even before. Thank you for bringing me.” Lucille says, meaning it.

“You are welcomed anytime. The bar will always have someone you know in it, whether it's my gran, me, or another player. So you won’t have to worry about that.”

“I’ll be back. The potatoes were pretty great.”

Valerie laughs. “There’s more where that came from.” She pauses, becoming serious. “I know what it is like to pick up your life and be somewhere new with new people. I don’t mind showing you around or helping out where I can.”

“It hasn’t been too bad. The team and staff have been really welcoming. A big thing for me, though, is finding a church. I’m visiting one tomorrow. I’m nervous to be going by myself. I’ve been attending the same church with my family all my life.” Lucille feels her stomach swoop at the thought. 

“Well, I mean, I could accompany you? I wouldn’t mind one bit, might be good for me.” Valerie offers with a small laugh.

“Really? That would be wonderful. But you don’t have to! I don’t want to take you away from your own church.” Lucille’s brown eyes are already shining with hope, so Valerie knows she can’t recant her offer.

“It’s no big deal. I don’t think my church will miss me.” Valerie laughs. Lucille scrunchers her eyebrows, not getting the joke. “Here, take my phone and put your number in it then text yourself. Just shoot me the details and I’ll pick you up in the morning.” She reaches in her middle console to pull out her phone. She never carries it with her.

Lucille takes it in her hand and stares down at it. “A flip phone? What year is it?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m a 25 year old with a flip phone. All I need is to be able to call or occasionally text and I’m gold. It hardly leaves my Jeep anyways.” Valerie never had technology growing up and she probably won’t buy it anytime soon.

“I get it. I’m 23 with no social media presence. But I atleast have an iPhone.” Lucille giggles as she works her way around the fossil to add her number and text random letters to herself so she has Valerie’s number. 

“I have an iPod in my locker that I keep for my workouts and that is all I need.” She takes her phone back where Lucille is offering it, their fingers brushing on the transfer. 

They’re quiet the rest of the ride to Lucille’s parked car. When Valerie pulls beside the Fiatt, she turns toward Lucille with a closed smile. 

“I’ll text you the church’s location, service time, and my address when I make it home. I appreciate you going with me, Valerie.” She looks at Valerie through her eyelashes, suddenly shy.

“No problem. You don’t even have to mention it.” Silence engulfs them again as they search for a way to say goodbye.

“Thanks again for taking me tonight. I had a great time and your grandmother is a dear.” Lucille opens her door and steps out, not closing it until Valerie replies.

“I’ll see you in the morning.” Valerie says. She watches Lucille get in her car and then follows her tail lights out of the parking lot, grinning ear to ear. 

****


	5. Chapter 5

Valerie looks at herself in the mirror. She finally decided to wear her nicest button up blouse, a light blue silky material, her fitted black dress pants that stop at the ankles, and black Oxfords. She looks over to the pile of clothes she left on her bed last night. She couldn’t decide what to wear to take Lucille to church. She doesn’t own a dress or skirt and she barely owns professional clothes; she has never needed them for her chosen careers. She _really_ hopes Lucille doesn’t expect her to be in a dress. 

She brings her hand up to cover her yawn. Valerie was up entirely too late last night between trying to find something suitable to wear, replaying her conversations with Lucille, and googling the details of the church they will be visiting. 

She thought about texting Trixie for fashion advice, but quickly decided against it. She knew Trixie would only tease her, and she wants to keep this trip with Lucille to herself. She isn’t sure why. 

Valerie checks what she refers to as her “fancy watch”, only wearing it on special occasions, and nods to herself in the mirror, grabbing her things. She texts Lucille that she is on her way as she is walking out the door. Her stomach rolls and her palms itch. She feels like she is about to take the field for a championship game. 

She climbs into her Jeep and checks Lucille’s apartment address one more time before pulling out. She sniffs. Last night, when she got home, she made sure she took all her equipment out, cracked the windows a bit, and sprayed some Febreeze. 

She pulls up to Lucille’s apartment and debates if she should just text her to let her know she is outside, or go to the building’s doors and buzz for her. One doesn’t feel like enough and one feels like too much. 

She ultimately decides to be too much, having an instilled fear of being too little, and buzzes Lucille’s apartment. Not a minute later, Lucille walks out, all warm smiles and nervous energy. “Good morning.” She greets Valerie softly.

Valerie is dazed for a moment. She takes in Lucille’s modest long sleeve yellow dress and short heels. This is the first time Valerie has seen her outside of her polo and khakis. She has more makeup on than she wears at the field, but it is still conservative. Her curly hair is down and pinned back on one side, showing off her face. Her honey eyes glow in the Sunday morning sun. “Good morning!” She squeaks. “You all ready?” She asks.

Lucille nods and they make their way to the car. Before Valerie can stop herself, she opens the Jeep’s door for Lucille. The woman is wearing a pretty dress, it is only polite, she thinks. 

Lucille’s cheeks warm and she whispers a ‘thank you’ as she tilts her head down, looking up through her lashes. 

Valerie walks around the front and hops in. She’s enveloped with Lucille’s perfume as soon as she shuts the door. Her old Jeep has never smelled better. “According to this church’s website, there is no dress code. I hope slacks are okay. I haven’t owned a dress in this life.” Valerie says, feeling a little insecure next to the beautiful woman. 

“You looked at the church’s website?” Lucille asks, charmed. Valerie keeps her eyes on the road, feeling bashful. “You clean up well, Captain. You look very nice.” Lucille reassures, looking from Valerie’s hands on the steering wheel, to the collar of her shirt, her strong jaw, and her gaze lands on her blue eyes. They’re shining brighter today, her blue shirt making them more prominent. 

“I just don’t want to embarrass you.” She jokes. “Have you always gone to church?” Valerie asks, stopping behind the Sunday morning rush.

“Yes. It is one of the most important things in my life. I’ve been going since I was just a few weeks old. I know most people my age kind of wean off church when they leave home and then join again when they’re older, but it is something that keeps me grounded.”

“It’s nice that you genuinely enjoy it. I’ve never been to church. The closest I’ve come is weddings and funerals. I think I just witnessed too much hypocrisy and division in churches when I was growing up. I also never had anyone to take me. My gran wasn’t exactly welcomed, being a barmaid.” Valerie shrugs. She doesn’t feel like she really missed out on anything.

“There is a big difference between religion and church. I could go on about my issues with religion forever.” She laughs. “Wait.” Lucille says, scrunching her eyebrows. “You don’t go to church?”

“No.” Valerie says, suddenly nervous this might be a problem between them.

“Valerie! I would have never made you take me if I knew. I shouldn’t have assumed. We don’t have to go. We can just get breakfast instead.” 

“And waste that pretty dress?” Valerie asks. “No. Come on. It’s fine. It might be nice.” She says, not confident it will be but knowing her company is nice at least. “Besides, I promised I’d show you around town. This is me following through.”

Lucille smiles down at her hands, positively charmed by the woman beside her. She hasn’t had many female friends in her life, but she could get used to this, she thinks. “I still feel bad. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

“I won’t be any more uncomfortable than I am in everyday life as it is.” They both laugh.

“Well, you’re letting me buy you lunch after! You choose the place and get whatever you want. It is the least I can do.” Valerie opens her mouth to respond, “Ah. No arguing.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Valerie does a faux salute. She pulls in a parking spot and cuts the engine. “I do hope you find a church here that helps you feel at home.” She says.

Lucille looks over to her and speaks softly, “I think this is a good start.” 

They both get out of the car and start walking towards the open doors of the church where a few men stand around, greeting the people as they walk in. As soon as they get to the door, they’re greeted with a chorus of ‘good mornings’ and ‘welcomes’ with handshakes. 

When they step inside, a man excitedly shouts, “You’re Valerie Dyer!” He hurries over to shake her hand enthusiastically. 

“Yes?” Valerie says, not sure why this man knows her name.

“I’m so sorry. Just, my daughter and wife are huge fans of yours! They have been since you led UC to the conference championship back in 2015!” He finally lets go of her hand, seemingly realizing he is coming on strong. “We were just watching the news last night and saw your interview with the River Roses. That is how I am able to recognize you so quickly.” He rubs at the back of his head.

“I’m just flattered to learn I have fans.” She jokes. She knows she needs to handle this conversation well. Mrs. Buckle did give her a long talk about these types of situations, afterall. She looks over to Lucille who is just quietly watching the conversation unfold with a small smirk on her face. “This is Lucille. She is actually the team’s athletic trainer. She is new to town and looking for a church, so I thought I’d show her around.” 

They shake hands, “Good morning, Lucille. Welcome. I’m Darren. You chose an excellent church. I am an usher so I can show you to your seats!” They nod and start to follow him to the pews. “It is so exciting about a professional softball team coming to town. I was raised on the Reds, just like the rest of Cincinnati, but having a daughter… this will be great for her.” 

“I definitely wish we had a team like this when I was growing up, but I am proud to be part of the start.” Valerie says. “Our first game is coming up in a couple weeks. Home game, of course. You’ll have to bring her out. I’ll even show her around the stadium if you’re able to catch me before we start.” Valerie offers. She is going to score big with Mrs. Buckle.

“Wow. I don’t even know what to say!” The man says, almost vibrating. Lucille giggles beside her as they take a seat. Valerie lightly elbows her. “Thank you so much, I-” The preacher steps up to the microphone, marking the start of the service. 

Valerie winks and says, “Just find me before whatever game you guys get to come to.” He nods and hurries off to the doors of the church. 

“I didn’t ever think you’d have fanboys.” Lucille whispers, giggling again. 

Valerie looks over to her, trying to hide her embarrassment at having such attention directed to her, especially in front of Lucille. “That hardly ever happens anymore. In college, yeah. I was a small town celebrity.” She winks, faking confidence. 

“I didn’t know I was in the company of Cincinnati royalty.” Lucille turns her head towards Valerie, ducking her head behind Valerie’s shoulder to hide her giggles as the preacher starts the introduction. Valerie’s head swims with the close proximity, she doesn’t even care if she is getting made fun of. In church, of all places! She thinks with a fond headshake. 

Valerie and Lucille straighten themselves and focus on the preacher’s words. He is going over prayer requests now. Valerie lets her eyes roam around the congregation. She feels herself stiffen when she realizes she recognizes quite a few of the men. They’re cleaned up and sober, but she knows they frequent Elsie’s Bar. She also knows they’ll recognize her. She is aware of how churches feel about bars and she is afraid these men will be scared she will say something to them in front of their wives who definitely aren't on their mind when they are drinking. She doesn’t want to cause any trouble in what could be Lucille’s future church. She focuses back on the preacher and tries to avoid eye contact.

The preacher introduces the choir and takes a seat as they start their short performance. 

Lucille notices Valerie’s tense posture and scoots closer. She keeps her eyes forward, nodding along to the music, not wanting the other woman to try to hide her discomfort if she realizes Lucille caught on. 

Valerie glances down when she feels her scoot over. Their hips are touching now. Their thighs would be, but Lucille has her legs crossed. Valerie glances down to the woman’s heels, up her legs, and to the hem of her dress. She quickly looks forward again when she realizes what she is doing, her neck and ears burning.

Valerie feels shame at how she is feeling sitting in a church. This is the main reason she never gave church and religion a try, even when she was old enough to take herself. She is well aware of herself and how she feels towards women, as well as what the church thinks about such things. Though she is not religious herself, a huge part of the population is and that has been enough to keep her from being honest about herself with other people. She has only opened up to one person in her life, while she was enlisted, and it almost ruined her.

The choir transitions from an old church hymn to a modern contemporary christian song. 

There was a nurse in her squad she’d grown close to. They were the only women in the squad. They stuck close to each other and had each other’s backs. While the men were being crude and nasty, they were able to be soft and gentle with only each other. They found an escape from everything around them within each other. Valerie knew she had feelings for the other woman. She’d known she liked women since late high school but had always been too focused on other things to do anything about it. She wasn’t sure the other woman liked women and she couldn’t come out and ask her. 

While “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was no longer in place, its effects very much were still intact. There was a deep fear for anyone in the army that wasn’t straight and they all knew to never talk about it, for their own safety from their own men. 

One night, Valerie was particularly distraught and vulnerable after losing a soldier. He was brought to the medical tent with a broken leg. The bone had pierced through his skin. Valerie had seen worse, and after a quick surgery, the surgeon sent him off to be supervised by Valerie. Before she knew it, he came down with a serious infection and was gone not 48 hours later. He died from a broken leg. Valerie felt hopeless and useless. She couldn’t even save a man with a broken leg, she had kept repeating to the woman when she was sent back to her barracks. 

The woman took her into her arms that night, and one thing led to another. It was a new experience for Valerie, one that was special to her. The next morning, however, the woman iced her out. She wouldn’t as much as look at Valerie. She seemed as if she was disgusted with what they did, even though she started it and was a willing participant. Eventually, the woman started spreading rumors that Valerie came onto her, that she was a “Desert Lizard”. The men caught on, one man in particular, Vince Pugh.

He was a sleazy, sleazy man. He had a wife at home but that didn’t stop him from being sent to Valerie to be treated for sexually transmitted diseases. He was bold too, with no shame. Valerie would be treating him for a disease and he’d be hitting on her at the same time. He disgusted Valerie and she let him know it every time. His pride was continually bruised by her, and that didn’t sit right with him. When he got wind of her being gay, the situation escalated and almost broke Valerie. The whole squad turned on her. Her working environment was even more toxic than it already was, considering she was in a foreign country giving half assed medical help to soldiers and innocent civilians for a cause she didn’t really believe in. She felt no one had her back in a warzone and no one ever stood up for her. She wasn’t ever going to throw the other woman under the bus, either. She just put her head down and focused on her patients.

Her supervisors got involved, no one was ever punished and her and the other woman never spoke again. Valerie learned eventually the woman had a husband the whole time. Valerie was coming to the end of her four years and that situation helped her decide to not to reenlist for four more. She hasn’t been with a woman since. She made a promise to herself to never, ever go through that again. She learned a hard lesson about what happens when she lets her walls down. 

She feels a tug at her elbow and looks up at Lucille. She realizes everyone is standing. She gets to her feet and Lucille shuffles closer with an open hymn book for them to share. Lucille throws a questioning look to her, but Valerie just smiles and shakes her head. “I am extremely tone deaf.” Valerie leans over so Lucille can hear her over the piano.

“I can’t hold a tune, don’t worry. I sing quietly so no one catches on.” She smiles up at her and they follow along with the words, Valerie only mouthing them. She can hear Lucille singing quietly beside her and lets it settle her racing heart. 

Even if she let herself have feelings for the woman beside her, Valerie knows she’d just end up hurt again. Lucille is obviously wealthy, beautiful, smart; they just don’t belong in the same crowd. Valerie wouldn’t let Lucille lower herself down for someone like her. On top of that, they work together, it’d be inappropriate. Mostly, though, Valerie fears what Lucille would think of her, should she find out her deepest secret. She is a devout Christian, after all. Christians don’t have the best track record with being open minded. They haven’t known each other long, but Valerie already knows she doesn’t want to lose Lucille, so she will settle for friendship and keep this thing inside her to herself. 

After they finish singing, the preacher announces, “Shake hands and fellowship!” Valerie turns to Lucille and playfully shakes her hand in greeting. They turn and immediately run into Darren, who now has his wife and daughter in tow. He introduces both Valerie and Lucille. Darren embarrasses his teenage daughter to Valerie while his wife occupies Lucille and invites her to their ladies meetings. 

The church settles back down, taking their seats. Lucille and Valerie unconsciously sit even closer together this time. Valerie is able to keep her thoughts contained for the rest of the service, focusing on the drone of the preacher and Lucille’s warmth beside her.

****

“So,” Valerie starts, backing out of her parking space. “What’d you think?” She puts her hand on the back of Lucille’s seat, looking over her shoulder. 

“It was a little too-” Lucille begins, trying to find the right words. “White.” she finishes, not able to come up with something better.

Valerie lets out a surprised laugh. “It was very WASP-y.” She agrees.

“Darren was nice, though.” Lucille says, her voice holding a smirk as she side-eyes Valerie.

“He was very enthusiastic. He said his wife and daughter are the fans, but they didn’t seem to care.” 

“His daughter was definitely putting on an act. You made her week.” Lucille smiles, thinking back to Valerie interacting with the teen. “You were great with them.” 

“Please, pass that on to Mrs. Buckle.” Valerie itches her car through the Sunday bustle. 

“Don’t forget, I’m buying you lunch so just aim us in the direction of the restaurant of your choice.” Lucille commands. 

“There is a little hole in the wall cafe down from my apartment. Not many people know about it so there shouldn’t be a church crowd.” Valerie aims her car in that direction. “Do you have a church you want to try out next week?” She asks.

“I have a few picked out. I might actually do a little research on them before I go so I know if I’ll even fit in.” Being comfortable in a church is half the battle. “You know, look at their website. Like you did.” Lucille is still charmed by this fact. She is swooning over this whole experience. The other woman took her to church when she doesn’t attend church herself _and_ researched said church. She looks over to Valerie, who keeps her eyes focused on the road although the tip of her right ear is turning pink. The more she learns about the team captain, the more she sees how tender hearted and thoughtful she is. 

“I’ll go with you next Sunday, too, if you want me to.” Valerie feels the other woman’s eyes on her. She doesn’t know what she is looking for but she hopes she finds it. She keeps her eyes on the road, not brave enough to find out if she does. 

“I’d like that.” Lucille says softly.

Valerie points out a few other good places to eat that only locals know about, some corner markets, and safe gas stations. “I live in that building,” She points as she drives by. “So I know this area pretty well.” She parallel parks in front of the cafe and they walk inside with a bell signaling their arrival. They order at the counter and find a small table in the front window. 

“It’s small and outdated, but I promise, best coffee drinks and sandwiches you’ll find.”

“I trust your opinion since you were right about the potato wedges.” They smile at each other as the waitress drops off their drinks. 

From there, the conversation flows easily. They talk about their classes in college, how they decided their major, how they both got into sports (Valerie’s playing and Lucille’s job), and their favorite teams. The topics are lighter than they have been previously between them, something Valerie realizes halfway through lunch. She has already shared a lot of herself with Lucille. 

****

After dropping Lucille off at her apartment, Valerie heads to her gran’s for her Sunday visit. They aren’t open on Sundays so they both cherish the days when they can just visit as family, not as coworkers. She lets herself in the upstairs apartment. 

Her gran is sitting in her recliner, her feet kicked up. “My Valerie!” She greets, as if she hadn’t seen her just late last night. Valerie doesn’t think she will ever get tired of her gran’s warm welcomes, though.

“My Gran!” She says back. She bends down to kiss her cheek and takes a seat on the worn couch. 

“Why, aren’t you dressed up.” Gran says, a question in her voice.

“I went with Lucille to church this morning.” At her gran’s surprised look, Valerie explains. “You know, she is new and it is important to her. She told me she was nervous so I just offered. No big deal.” Valerie shrugs, looking around for the TV remote to distract herself. She should’ve known her gran would’ve noticed her clothing.

Elsie, however, knows it is a big deal. Valerie would get panic in her eyes in the past at just the mention of church, and now she is attending? She just nods, letting the topic go for now. 

They start talking about the team, the scrimmage, the media, and the fast approaching start of the regular season. They briefly talk business, discussing numbers, employees, and future events but Elsie quickly waves away that talk. 

Throughout the early evening, Elsie notices Lucille’s name coming up a lot. “How long have you known Lucille, again?” She asks.

“Oh, just a week tomorrow! I can’t believe that.” Valerie says, looking off above the TV, thinking.

Elsie observes her granddaughter. She sees the way she put effort into her outfit today, her cropped hair is tamed, her slacks ironed. She sees the small smile at the corner of her mouth. The light in her blue gray eyes. She silently hopes Valerie will be brave, like Elsie knows she is and can be. She hopes she goes after what she wants and deserves. Elsie then sends a silent plea that Lucille is truly as good as she seems, and that the woman can see exactly who her granddaughter is. 

****

The next day, Lucille walks up to Valerie while she is stretching with her team, hands her a Gatorade, the flavor Lucille observed her drinking last week, and a granola bar. As she is handing them over, she tells Valerie it’s just a small ‘thank you’ for taking her to church. Valerie takes the items and watches Lucille walk away, frozen. She knows what is about to come.

“ _Church_?!” Trixie splutters. At least she waited until Lucille was out of earshot, Valerie thinks. She gets ribbed for the rest of practice, but every time she takes a sip from the Gatorade, she can’t help but smile. 

****


	6. Chapter 6

Lucille feels her wrist buzz and looks down at her watch. Another text from Cyril, wishing her luck at her first official game. He called her last night and tried to get her to let him come. Lucille found it hard to sternly tell him no while making it seem like she would like to see him. The thought of him being here today went against her very core, and she didn’t want to give him any ideas, but also didn’t want him to know just how much she didn’t want him there. She wasn’t sure why she didn’t want her boyfriend there to support her, any other girl would love the thoughtfulness. She told herself it is because she isn’t the one playing, it is her job, not something she needs anyone’s support to accomplish. 

Her wrist buzzes again and this time it is her mom, asking her what channel the game will be on. After two weeks of being in Cincinnati, her mother started texting her. They haven’t talked on the phone, and she hasn’t heard from her father yet, but it’s something more than the radio silence she’d been receiving. 

Someone knocks on the frame of her office door and she turns in her chair to see Frances. Lucille nods for her to come in and take a seat on the medical table. Frances stubbed two of her fingers catching Patsy the other day at practice and she needs them wrapped before the game. 

In the month that Lucille has been in Cincinnati, the players are slowly needing her more and more as the practices get tougher and longer. She usually has a line outside her office before anyone even hits the field, different limbs needing taped up and certain braces needing strapped up properly. Once she has those players taken care of, they make their way to the field where others need stretching or some knot in their muscle rubbed out. Lucille is quite busy these days. She prays these fixable ailments are the only things that continue to keep her busy, and nothing more serious. 

She finishes taping Frances up, squeezing her wrist gently when she sees the catcher is shaking. Frances gets particularly nervous, even before practices. Lucille can feel it radiating off of her right now. She guides her out of her office and walks with her to the field, speaking softly to her about nothing, trying to get her to calm down a little bit. They part with Lucille giving Frances a supportive pat to her back before she runs off to grab her glove. 

There is over an hour before game time but the River Roses are already milling about, braiding hair, putting eye black on, and lacing up their cleats. The coaching staff is busy getting the field ready; Coach Julienne and Coach Crane putting chalk down at home plate, Coach Winnie putting all the bases down, and Coach Buckle giving the ball boy, Reggie, instructions. Mrs. Buckle is showing some men with cameras where they can set up to stream the game. Lucille feels herself grow excited, this is the real deal. She can’t help but feel happy for the players, who have become her friends in the last several weeks. 

The team has treated her like one of the players. They invite her everywhere and include her in everything. She knows her being close in age to most of the players help but she feels like she has clicked well with everyone. She finally feels like Cincinnati is becoming her home.

Valerie, who she has yet to see today, is the most to thank for Lucille feeling like she fits in with the team. Valerie has continued to walk Lucille to her car after every night practice, she still takes her to church with a lunch following every Sunday, invites her out every Saturday, and Lucille even goes to Elsie’s a couple afternoons a week for lunch in between practices while Valerie works her shift. They have spent almost everyday together, becoming fast friends. Lucille has never had any female friends, not since grade school, but she knows it feels nice to have Valerie. 

Lucille finally spots Valerie coming out of the tunnel, showing a family around. She recognizes Darren and his wife and daughter. They’re all smiling, hanging onto every word Valerie is saying as she speaks animatedly with her hands, pointing out different things in the stadium. Mrs. Buckle zeroes in on them and drags a camera boy behind her, instructing him to catch the moment. 

Valerie waves them off soon, after posing for a picture with the young girl and then giving Darren and his wife polite handshakes. Mrs. Buckle happily escorts them to their seats, her and Darren talking excitedly. 

Valerie joins Lucille in the dugout, adjusting her burgundy button up jersey and tugging at her navy blue softball belt. They’re wearing the white pants with burgundy pinstripes and burgundy socks today. “Aren’t you fancy in your official polo.” Valerie says, pulling Lucille’s attention away from her form fitting softball pants. 

She looks down to her navy blue polo with the official River Rose emblem on the left side of her chest, her name etched underneath. “I could say the same. The uniforms look great. Looking like a real team.” Lucille replies. 

Valerie smiles and sits on the bench, facing Lucille and then stretches her legs on the seat between them. Lucille, getting the hint, stands up and grabs her foam roll from her pile of supplies in the corner. Valerie has been suffering from shin splints this week; Lucille has had to roll them out everyday before practice. 

“Still hurting?” Lucille asks as she lays the roll at Valerie’s ankles, applying slight pressure, and slowly rolling it up to her knees and then back down.

“Like a sin.” Valerie says. 

“I really thought they’d be better by now.” Lucille says, scrunching her eyebrows up in thought.

The truth is, they aren’t _really_ hurting anymore. Valerie was almost disappointed when she walked to the bathroom this morning and her shins didn’t hurt, meaning she would miss out on this routine she has fallen into with Lucille. But, Valerie reasoned, Lucille has a calming effect on her and it is especially needed today. Getting her shins rolled out one more time won’t hurt anyone. Besides, she needs to be as calm as she can for their first official game, the stakes are high and she is the team captain, afterall.

Valerie watches her, eyes tracing over the small moles at the corner of her nose to the soft curls brushing against her face. Lucille pokes around her shins, looking for any signs of pain. Valerie remembers to wince every so often. She puts on a show, because she needs this; for the team, dammit. 

Lucille pauses her prodding of Valerie’s shins to rifle through her medical bag. “I’m going to apply some Biofreeze, it should help with the pain. Did you take your ibuprofen already?” Valerie nods. She turns back around and gently rolls down Valerie’s socks. Lucille squirts some ointment on her hands and rubs it into Valerie’s skin. Valerie lets out a gasp at the contact, “Sorry, I should’ve warned you it’d be cold. It’ll warm up fast.” Lucille says, mistaking Valerie’s noise.

Valerie just bites her lip and breathes out a breath, puffing out her flaming cheeks like a blowfish. She hopes Lucille doesn’t lift her eyes from where they are focused on her shins. 

“What’s wrong with you, Rosie?” Trixie snickers at her own joke, walking up to Valerie and ruffling her hair like a puppy. 

“Just,” Valerie starts, sounding strangled before clearing her throat. “Pain.” She finishes dumbly. 

“I’m sorry, I’m almost done.” Lucille reassures. She knows Biofreeze can burn and she has to apply a bit of rough pressure to get it rubbed in so it can take effect. She rolls Valerie’s socks back up, tucking them into the elastic of her softball pants. “All finished!” She pats her leg and stands to get wet wipes for her hands, not wanting to accidentally rub her eyes with this on her hands. She probably should’ve put gloves on before touching Valerie’s skin. She wasn’t thinking.

Behind Lucille’s back, Valerie is having a stare off with a fully made up Trixie. Trixie just looks amused, red painted lips quirked up and eyebrows raised. 

One of the coaches yell for them to hit the field to start their warmup routine; the other team, Texas Charge, having arrived at the field. 

****

After each team gets their turn practicing defense, team captains have met and shook hands at the plate, and the National Anthem performed, the River Roses players and staff gather around for a circle prayer led by Monica Joan. She’s decked out, head to toe, in River Rose memorabilia, and even has half her face painted. She looks insane, Valerie loves it. 

Everyone links hands and bows their heads, listening to MJ thank God for the opportunity to finally cheer on women and from there she gets sidetracked, thanking God for the ballpark concession stand foods. As she is naming off the entire menu, Valerie peeks up and sees Lucille doing the same. They connect eyes and share a silent laugh about the direction the prayer has taken. Valerie winks and Lucille ducks her head back down with a smile. Valerie smiles to herself and bows her head as Coach Julienne interrupts MJ to end the prayer, the umpire having come over to tap her on the shoulder. 

****

Lucille watches both teams shake hands, trying not to let her disappointment show on her features. In the top of the seventh inning, the Texas Chargers scored three runs, putting them ahead of the River Roses by two. In the bottom half of the inning, the River Roses just couldn’t pull through for the win. Lucille saw the whole team’s shoulders droop. She knows this game was important for the whole organization. 

Most of the team returns to the dugout, packing their gear up to head to the locker room. Lucille joins them, gathering all her supplies in her bag. Valerie, Patsy, and Coach Julienne had been corralled by the media for post game interviews. She shakes her head, she doesn’t know how they’re supposed to perform for the media after a heartbreaking loss like that, but Lucille guesses that is part of their job.

She doesn’t really know what to do with herself; they were planning on going to Elsie’s after the game. Is that still on the table even though they lost? She decides to head to her office to put up her supplies and type up a report for the day. She has to email all her reports so far to Dr. Turner tomorrow. They have their first office meeting tomorrow afternoon. 

Valerie always comes to her office after she is finished in the locker room, so if the plans are still on, she will come get her. 

****

Valerie is once again the last left in the locker room, but she is thankful for the reprieve. The media held her up on the field while everyone else was already showering and getting ready for the bar. She sits down on the bench in front of her locker and towels off her hair a little more. 

Her team has yet to see her truly lose her cool, the closest being her little disagreement with Lucille. She needs a moment to herself to fix her attitude before she faces everyone else. She doesn’t want to accidentally take it out on anyone. She has never been very good at losing. She _really_ wanted this win, too. She knows she is going to have the sexist men in her ear all week at the bar jawing off to why we should’ve just left baseball to the “boys”. This was their chance to prove to everyone in the city and nation that softball was serious and more cities should create a team. And then they lost. 

To rub salt in the wound, she had to be interviewed over and over again. The same questions asked before she even got a chance to form a proper response. Why’d they lose? What do they need to work on? Is she still proud of her team? Is there a future for the organization? She had to answer them all with a smile on her face because God forbid she feel emotion. She throws her hair towel into her open locker. 

She pulls on her black skinny jeans and plain white t-shirt, topping it off with her worn jean jacket and white converses. She brought this outfit thinking she’d be celebrating at the bar. What does she even say to her teammates? She is the captain, she can’t just not say anything. Everyone will be blaming themselves or each other. This is shit, she thinks as she roughly runs her hands through her hair. 

She grabs her wallet and keys before slamming her locker door shut. She walks out and sees Lucille’s office light is still on. Valerie takes a deep breath. She can’t act like a sore loser in front of the woman. She tries to adjust her posture and lightly knocks on the door frame, pulling Lucille’s attention from her laptop. “Are you still up for Elsie’s?” Valerie asks.

“Yeah, yeah. I wasn’t sure if _you_ would be.” Lucille closes her laptop and grabs her keys. “How are you doing?” She has already caught onto Valerie’s barely concealed sour mood just by her tone and her stance.

“I just don’t know what I am supposed to say to the rest of the girls.” Valerie admits, shoving her hands in her jacket’s pockets. “I don’t have any positive words for them yet.” 

They start walking in the direction of the parking lot. “You girls played a great game. There was only one error, and that didn’t even result in any runs. All the runs were earned. They just scored at the last minute.” Lucille tried to reason. They really didn’t play bad. There were hardly any mistakes.

“That’s what makes it so tough, Lu.” Valerie says, the nickname slipping without her noticing. “We were almost flawless, yet it wasn’t good enough. What if we aren’t good enough? _That_ is the exact thought I’m sure everyone is thinking right now.” She shakes her head. She fingers at the pack of cigarettes in her pocket. She really wants one right now, but she wouldn’t dare in front of Lucille. “If we aren’t good enough, then the program gets axed or the organization just trades us players in and tries to rebuild with better versions.” Valerie shakes her head with a scoff and leans against the front bumper of her jeep. She hates the politics of it all, she wishes they could just _play_. “What do I say when this is on all our minds?” She asks. 

Lucille leans against the door of her own car, thinking over Valerie’s words. She doesn’t know what to say, she hasn’t ever played sports and she doesn’t truly know the pressure Valerie must be feeling right now. She also doesn’t know how to handle this version of Valerie, having only ever seen her in good spirits. They stand in silence for a few moments, neither in a rush to join the rest of the team at the bar. Lucille hates seeing the slump of the other woman’s shoulders, her jaw set harshly, her infectious dimpled smile absent. Lucille is in the middle of looping her keys through her fingers when she gets an idea.

“Here, heads up.” She says before tossing her keys at Valerie. Valerie catches them easily, a question in her eyes. “You can drive us to Elsie’s. In _my_ car.” She finishes. 

“No way.” Valerie breathes, a reluctant grin breaking through. “I can’t drive your car. What if something happens? I’ll never be able to afford it.”

“I think you can handle driving us through a city we both know you know well.” Lucille says, walking around to the passenger side and getting in. She nods her head when she closes her door and Valerie still hasn’t moved.

Valerie scrambles to get inside. She puts the keys in the ignition and takes a deep breath, running her hands along the steering wheel, which catches Lucille’s eyes. She smiles her signature grin, her dimples finally showing, and reaches over to quickly squeeze Lucille’s hand. “Thank you. I know what you’re doing, and it is working.” She takes her hand back and starts to move from the parking spot carefully. 

“We can think of a few things you can say to your team on the way.” Lucille offers.

****

Valerie is still feeling her high from driving Lucille’s car when she opens the bar door for the woman to walk through first. Lucille even took the top off. Of the car. The top off of the car. Valerie’s brain short circuits. 

She comes back to earth when she walks in and the bar is oddly quiet and subdued. The team is scattered around drinking their respective drinks while the TV on the wall covers the highlights of the game. No one brought their partners, Valerie realizes when she notices Chummy’s husband isn’t beside her and the absence of Tom with Barbara. 

Barbara is instead leaning with her arm on the back of Trixie’s chair, watching her drink an old fashioned while she sips her own whiskey sour. Chummy, Jane, and Jenny are at the next booth, appetizers sitting untouched in the middle of their table. Valerie is briefly surprised to see Jenny had joined the team. Frances, Hilda, and Cynthia have a table pulled up beside their booth, silently playing cards. Valerie can tell Frances had been crying.

Gran notices Valerie arriving with Lucille and walks over to greet them. Her granddaughter isn’t nearly as broody as she had prepared for. She can clearly recall a moody young adult storming through that same door and stomping upstairs after a hard loss. Elsie is sure she has Lucille to thank for this. She hugs Lucille a little tighter at this thought and kisses Valerie’s cheek. 

“Sorry about the game, sweetheart. You played great. I watched every bit of it.” Elsie nods her head to the TV. She doesn’t care if her customers complain, she is watching her granddaughter’s games no matter what. “Your teammates have been waiting for their captain.”

Valerie nods, knowing what her gran is suggesting. She leaves Lucille with Gran and goes to stand in front of the TV, where she knows everyone’s eyes are trained. She has never been good at public speaking. She hasn’t ever given a speech to a team of her’s besides, “lets kick some ass!” She knows this is one of the most important roles of being the captain though, so she bucks up.

She takes a deep breath and begins, “I know everyone is feeling disappointed right now. I am not going to stand up here and tell you to _not_ feel that. Let yourself feel disappointed and mad and frustrated and upset. But only for tonight. Tomorrow is new, we get back to work for the next game. We got outplayed today. Not because they’re better, not because we made mistakes. We are a new team, a new organization. Most of us just met this year. We were never supposed to go into this season and kick every team’s ass by one hundred runs. Maybe next season.” This gets a few scattered laughs. “I’m not making excuses for us, you’ll never hear me do that. We need to get better. Faster, stronger, sharper. 

“We officially know what we are up against. We can let go of some of our first game jitters. Shake this one off. We have another game in a few days. Take these next few practices and really focus on yourself and what you add to this team and hone in on that the next game. I’m not great with words, and I’m sure whatever the coaches have to say tomorrow morning will be even better, but let's enjoy tonight. Drink, eat, and be merry. Good game, chicks.” Valerie nods and figuratively steps off her soapbox.

“Let's break it off ladies and get the party started!” Trixie shouts, sounding like the party already started for her. Everyone gets out of their seats and they make a huddle with their hands in the middle. They shout “family” on three and the mood is lighter from there on.

Several teammates pat Valerie on the back as she passes by them, murmuring things like, “good speech”, “thanks captain”, and “glad you finally shut up”. The last one was Trixie. She even got a nod of approval from Jenny.

She finally makes it behind the bar, stopping in front where Lucille is sitting. “The usual?” She asks.

“Elsie already put my order in.” Lucille smiles softly, looking at Valerie with hooded like eyes. Valerie noticed her eyes do that when she relaxes. “You did great up there.” Lucille nods towards the TV. “Everyone’s spirits are up again, so I think it worked.”

“I think that’s mostly due to Trixie’s encouragement and the drinks’ persuasion.” Valerie says, ever humble. 

Lucille just rolls her eyes at the captain as she sets her chin in her hand, resting against the bar. She watches as Valerie switches from team captain to bartender, waiting on her teammates and making sure everyone is having a good time. Lucille can’t help but admire the woman. She never stops. Even when she is meant to enjoy this time after a game with her team, she puts everyone before herself. She goes out of her way to make sure someone like Lucille is comfortable in a new city like it is her responsibility. She wonders if Valerie has anyone special taking care of her. Lucille doesn’t know how she wouldn’t know about them by now. But then she remembers how no one knows about Cyril. 

Lucille watches as Valerie causes Frances to turn bright red by simply complimenting her on a throwdown to second base midgame. Frances threw the girl out by a foot or more, it was impressive. Valerie grins with all her teeth, her eyes crinkling at the corners, holding up Frances’ throwing arm and presenting it to everyone like a precious jewel. Frances turns even redder, playfully swatting at Valerie until she lets go. Lucille smiles to herself at the scene.

“The coaches knew what they were doing when they made her captain.” Lucille jumps slightly at Barbara’s voice. She feels her cheeks warm up when she realizes she's been caught staring at Valerie. She’s thankful for her darker complexion. 

“I think she is a natural leader.” Lucille replies as Barbara takes a seat next to her. Barbara hums in reply as her eyes wander off. Lucille follows her eye line to where Trixie is showing Jenny something on her phone. “Where’s Tom?” Lucille asks.

“Hmm? Oh, I told him not to come.” She says, forcing her eyes away from Trixie. “I figured it should be a team only event, considering.” Barbara shrugs. She seems upset about something other than the game. Lucille has never seen Barbara act so nonchalant and distant.

“Are you okay, Barbara?” Lucille asks. She knows this question would be better coming from Valerie or Trixie, but she and Barbara have become decent enough friends, though, and she sat beside her for a reason, Lucille reasons. 

“Sometimes Trixie gets mad at me and I don’t know why.” She shares. She glances back towards Trixie, where Trixie quickly glances away. “I know she doesn’t like Tom, so I told him not to come. And then she gets mad that I told him not to come.” She throws her hands up. 

“Why doesn’t she like Tom?” Lucille asks. Tom seems nice enough, if not a little boring. But that is no reason to dislike the man.

“Well,” Barbara starts and stops. “It’s hard to explain. I mean, it’s complicated.” Lucille waits for her to organize her thoughts. “Trixie and I knew each other a couple years ago, before this team. I guess you could say we were close, but then this and that happened and we gradually lost contact. I started dating Tom. We moved on with life until suddenly we are at the same tryout. We rekindle our relationship like we didn’t stop talking for two years, but then something like this happens.” Barbara shrugs again and faces the bar, which forces her to stop glancing over at Trixie.

Lucille mulls over this. What Barbara just said doesn’t really explain why Trixie doesn’t like Tom. Lucille feels that maybe she should be reading between the lines, but she is still coming up empty. “Do you think,” Lucille starts and then cuts her off, shaking her head.

“No, tell me, please.” Barbara begs.

“I mean, do you think Trixie is jealous of Tom?” When Barbara’s eyes widen, Lucille back tracks. “No, no not like that! I, I don’t even know if Trixie is like _that_. Or, or if you are! Which, it’s fine if you are.” Lucille takes a deep breath and starts over. “I just mean, Tom takes your attention away from her and if you two lost contact once already, maybe she fears it might happen again.” Lucille is honestly spitballing, she doesn’t have a clue about where this conversation is heading and she feels wholly unprepared. If Barbara’s vague wording and widening eyes are any sign, Lucille feels Patsy may be better equipped to deal with this conversation. 

Barbara seems to think it over, though. “I guess that could be it. Thanks, Lucille.” Barbara offers a quick smile before looking back down at the bar. “Maybe don’t tell anyone about this conversation, yeah?” She asks.

“You never said anything,” She says, still a little lost. “But it’ll stay between me and you, Barbara.” Lucille promises, squeezing the woman’s elbow. 

****

The team closed the bar out at two in the morning. They are going to regret it at the morning practice, but everyone left feeling better than they came. Valerie puts the last chair up on the table before she hugs her gran and grabs her and Lucille’s keys. 

“You can drive back, too.” Lucille offers, already walking to the passenger side door. 

“Here, take my jacket then.” Valerie takes her jean jacket off and hands it to Lucille. It is mid June but the night air can be a bit nippy, especially since they’re driving with the top down. 

Lucille slips it on and is enveloped in everything Valerie. She settles into the passenger seat and feels the busy day settle in her bones. She can’t imagine how tired Valerie must feel. She played a whole game, dealt with the media, handled her team perfectly, and worked a shift at the bar. 

She turns slightly in her seat and leans against the door to watch Valerie. Seeing the other woman driving her car erupts butterflies in her stomach. She looks from where one hand is gripping the gear shift and the other is resting on the wheel. Valerie’s muscular arms flex with every turn she makes. Lucille finds herself mesmerized. Her eyes trail along her cleft chin to the tiny mole on her right cheek before she realizes Valerie has turned towards her. Lucille jerks her eyes back towards the road. Her throat tightens with these sudden feelings. She doesn’t know where they’ve come from. She knows she admires Valerie’s strength and kindness. And she has eyes, she can see she is a beautiful woman. She feels close to the other woman. She has never had female friends before and that is why she feels so much. She just needs to make more friends. And she needs to be sure to give Cyril more of her attention. Besides, the talk with Barbara is just getting to her, Lucille tells herself. 

Which, Barbara must’ve talked it out with Trixie because Trixie went home with Barbara instead of staying at Valerie’s. 

“Have you ever noticed how Trixie and Barbara fight sometimes?” Lucille asks. She promised Barbara she wouldn’t say anything, and she won’t. But she will fish around for answers from their closest friend.

“Yeah. Trixie gets moody sometimes and then Barbara is the type that wants to talk about it immediately and fix it. Trixie just needs time to let everyone know she is upset and then she is fine.” Valerie shrugs. 

“I didn’t know they knew each other before the team.”

“They don’t really talk about it and I know not to ask. I don’t know what happened. Don’t mention it around Tom, though. I don’t think he knows they have a history.” Valerie warns.

“History?” Lucille asks. She knows she is pushing it.

“Yeah, just a past, yanno.” Valerie says. She knows Lucille is probably catching on, but it isn’t her place. She has to give it to Lucille, though, she caught on a lot faster than Valerie did. 

Lucille lets it drop, respecting that Valerie isn’t going to give anymore information. They pull up to the stadium parking lot and Valerie parks beside her Jeep. “Thank you for letting me drive your car. Your plan worked.” Valerie winked. She pulls her keys out and they both step outside. 

“I didn’t like seeing you so discouraged.” Lucille admits. She walks over to the driver’s side and watches Valerie walk to her’s. 

“Hopefully the next game is a better outcome. We have our work cut out for us.” They stand at the respective cars, looking at each other for a moment before Lucille breaks it.

“You must be exhausted. You better get home and get a couple hours of sleep.” Lucille opens her car door and waits for Valerie to do the same.

“You’re right. I need to be ready for whatever Coach Crane has in store for us.” They laugh quietly. “I’ll see you bright and early, Lucille.”

“See you.” Lucille replies, ducking into her car with a soft smile. She’s already driving off when she realizes she still has Valerie’s jacket on.

****

The next day, Lucille finds herself gathered around a conference table in the doctor’s office. Dr. Turner bought everyone lunch since the meeting is during their break. After everyone grabs a sandwich and drink, they take their seats at the table.

Lucille smiles timidly at the woman sitting beside her, and the woman smiles just as timidly back. “I’m Lucille,” She offers first. “I’m the athletic trainer for the River Roses.”

The woman perks up at this. “I’m so jealous! That is a great gig.” She says. “Oh, I’m Delia. I am the trainer for the volleyball team at the University of Cincinnati.” 

Before the meeting starts, the two women get carried away talking about their respective jobs; Delia offers advice where she can, having done the job a little longer than Lucille. Delia shares that she watched the River Roses’ first game on TV and how she is already a huge fan of the team. Lucille gets the idea to invite her to their next game and then to Elsie’s afterwards, thinking Delia can be another female friend of her’s, that helps put a little distance between her and her infatuation with Valerie. Delia readily agrees and they exchange contact information. 

Dr. Turner starts the meeting and he goes around the table to each trainer, asking them to give a brief on their team and the injuries. Lucille is pleased that she only has a few stubbed fingers and pulled muscles to report. 

****

The conclusion of the next game against the Philadelphia Force is a much happier one. The River Roses cheer to their home stands while the fans cheer right back. Lucille feels the excitement buzzing through her own body, feeling proud of the players.

“Hey, Lu!” Lucille stops her trek to her office and turns to see Valerie jogging towards her, a happy grin plastered on her face. “You're heading to Gran’s, right?” Valerie asks. 

Lucille nods, “Yes, but I actually have a coworker and friend that came to the game today and I invited her out with us, I hope that is okay.”

Valerie feels a shot of jealousy strike through her but she quickly pushes it away. “Yeah. The more the merrier!” Valerie says.

“I’m going to put my bag in my office, lock up, and go find her. I’ll probably just drive her over.” Lucille tells Valerie. She doesn’t want Valerie to be looking around for her when she is finished with the locker room.

“Right. Okay. I’ll see you there, then.” Valerie smiles and turns to head through the locker room door. That was weird, right? Valerie thinks. It is kind of a tradition for them to go to the bar together. Valerie tries not to think about it too hard as she gets ready for the night.

****

Lucille and Delia beat most of the team to the bar, everyone else having to shower or at least change before driving over. Lucille spends the drive over giving a summary on everyone, including Gran, who Delia gets welcomed by first. 

Chummy and Jenny are the next to arrive. Chummy’s husband came out for this round. It turns out Jenny and Delia’s parents know each other so they spend some time talking about their similar social circles. 

It isn’t long until Patsy arrives with Cynthia, followed by the rest of the team, excluding Valerie. 

Patsy saddles up to the bar beside Delia, giving her drink order to one of the bartenders. She slowly looks over to Delia, realizing she isn’t one of her teammates. “Patsy, this is Delia, my coworker. She is the athletic trainer for UC’s volleyball team. Delia, this is Patsy, the-”

“The pitcher.” Delia finishes for Lucille, offering her hand to Patsy with a shy smile. “You pitched an amazing game today.” Delia compliments, the tips of her ears turning red. 

Patsy grins, “Thank you, Delia. What are you drinking?” Patsy orders another for Delia. Lucille furrows her eyebrows. She thinks her plan might’ve backfired as she watches how Delia subtly turns herself more towards Patsy, leaving Lucille staring at her back. 

That is how Valerie finds her. She watches her walk in, Lucille feeling slightly guilty at leaving the other woman to arrive by herself. She just thought a little distance was necessary. 

Valerie walks behind the bar and ties her apron around her waist, like she always does. “Hi, Val.” Lucille offers, feeling oddly shy after ditching her.

“Lucille.” Valerie grins, catching onto Lucille’s guilty look. “Is this your friend?” She nods her head to the side, where Patsy and Delia are now huddled together, talking closely. Valerie develops a shit eating grin.

Lucille leans forward, cupping her hand to cover her mouth from Patsy and Delia’s direction, “Patsy stole her from me.” She can’t help but giggle at the situation. 

The night goes on in celebration. Barbara once again without Tom. Her and Trixie seem to be having a good day, though. Barbara stops the music several times throughout the night to tell everyone how much she loves them until almost the entire team is joining in on the lovefest, the sober ones giggling amongst themselves. Patsy and Delia have sequestered themselves in a corner booth, giggling at a private joke. Chummy starts to play a game of darts and the team’s eyes collectively widen at the scene, knowing how clumsy she is. 

The entire night, anytime something funny occurred, Lucille felt her eyes automatically seek out Valerie, to see if she found it funny, too. Lucille felt her heart glow every time she realized Valerie’s eyes were seeking her out as well. 

****

“I am so sorry for ditching, Lucille. I never expected this to happen.” Delia says in the car at the end of the night. Lucille is dropping her off at Delia’s apartment. “I do appreciate you letting me tag along and inviting me.”

“Really, Delia. You have nothing to apologize for. I’m happy for you. And for Patsy.” She says genuinely.

“I don’t-” Delia starts, sounding emotional. “I don’t know where me and Patsy can go from this though. Casual flirting and exchanging of numbers. My parents,” Delia clears her throat. “They would be heartbroken. I still live at home. I could never do this to them. It wouldn’t fit our image. I’m supposed to be like Jenny Lee. I’m not supposed to be like this.” 

Lucille looks over at Delia before turning forward again. Her heart squeezes. She knows all too well about not wanting to disappoint parents. “Hey, hey, precious. Don’t cry. You’re not doing anything wrong.” She reaches over to grab Delia’s hand. “You don’t have to do anything until you’re ready. Patsy will understand.” Lucille’s traitorous mind flashes to Valerie.

“I’m so ready. So ready.” Delia says. She has been hiding for too long. 

“You don’t have to involve your parents right away, you know. What you get up to is none of their business until you share it. You are your own woman.” Lucille says, she squeezes her hand.

“You’re right. It can just be me and Patsy until we figure it out.” She sniffles, smiling thinking about the red headed pitcher. “At least they can’t send me off somewhere to straighten me out now that I’m over eighteen.” Delia jokes. 

Lucille’s laugh gets stuck in her throat. She has grown up hearing her parents talk. She knows what they would do and how they believe. Lucille has never shared that belief. She thinks it is just another way for religion to oppress people who aren’t WASPs and she refuses to fall for it. That doesn’t mean those beliefs haven’t affected her all her life and that they don’t cross her mind in situations like these. It doesn’t mean she would be brave enough herself to go against her family. Even if she doesn’t believe that way, her family, whom she loves, full heartedly does. She can’t even break up with her boyfriend, let alone be with a woman like Delia is trying to do. 

She pulls up in front of Delia’s house. “Thank you, Lucille, really. I had a great time. I’m glad we are friends, even if I wasn’t the best at showing it tonight.” Delia opens her door and steps out. She closes it when Lucille rolls down the window to continue talking to her.

“I’m glad you were able to come out. It looks like you’ll be joining us a lot more often so we have plenty of future chances to hang out.” Delia smiles with a light blush and walks to her front door. Lucille drives off once she is safely inside.

She calls Cyril since it is still relatively early, at least before midnight this time. She talks to him the rest of her way back to her apartment, letting his talk of engineering and cars calm her racing mind for once. 

****


End file.
